The MOTD

The MOTD was originall a daily quote, fact and piece of weird news that I sent 
out every day while at college to the sparse number of friends I had with an 
internet connection. It went down rather well until I realised that I actually 
needed to study if I was going to get a degree. :-) So I abandoned it.

But it's back and bigger and better than ever before, and you, yes you, you 
lucky people can have a dose of wit, wisdom and silliness delivered to your 
mailbox every day for free! All you need to do is send me a mail with your real 
e-mail address (i.e. not the one with the spam block that you use on Usenet) 
and 'Gimme the MOTD' or something like that somewhere in the message body or 
subject.

And not only that, knowing how hooked you'll be after your first issue, you can 
get back issues of the MOTDs you missed by mailing me and telling me which ones 
you want. Simple huh? (so am I, that's why I don't have a fancy mailing list 
program thingy.)

What do you get each day? A quote to make you smile or think; a guaranteed 
useless but fascinating fact (which may or may not be true - I don't check 
these things, I just type them.... in fact I've found out that quite a lot of 
them are utter codswallop, but I'm not going to tell you which ones. :-) ); a 
top tip, either unbelievably genuine, or wickedly silly; a piece of strange but 
true news, more often than not involving sex or crime, or even better - both; 
and finally a piece of ascii that I particularly like, usually because it's 
funny or just dead, dead good. :) All this every day for nought pounds and no 
pence!! Here's a sample:


                  [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]
                  []MOTD 21 Weds August 5th 1998[]
                  [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]


           ((  ___                 ))
              /   \    ,___,_|_  _
             (    \) / | / \ |  /_\
              \___/\/\_| \_/ |_/\__,
                  of the day

"Microsoft  programs  are  generally  bug-free.  If you visit the Microsoft
hotline,  you'll  literally  have to wait weeks if not months until someone
calls in with a bug in one of our programs.  99.99% of calls turn out to be
user mistakes."  - Bill Gates

              ___   __    ___  ___
             | |_  / /|  / /   | |
             |_|  /_/ |  \_\_  |_|
                  of the day

Barbie  is  actually  an  almost exact copy of a german doll for Grown ups.
Lili  was made by a sex toy manufacturer and was usually given as a present
for a joke.

      ____   _____W E_I_R D ____    __  __
     /  __) (_   _) /  O\  (   O\  (_ \/ _)
     \__  \   | |  (     )  | _ <    \  /
     (____/  (___)  \___/  (__|\_)   (__)
              O F  T H E  D A Y

Shulamit  Dezhin,  82, passed her driver's test in Ashdod, Israel, after 35
failures.  She originally wanted her license so she could visit her parents
in Tel Aviv, but she took so long that they died first.

                _     _
               | |_  (_)doubtfully
               |  _|  _    _useful
               | |   | |  |  _ \
               | |   | |  | |_) )
               |_|   |_|  |  __/
                  of the  | |
                   day    |_|

You  can make a bottle of everyday hair conditioner last much longer if you
use  it  as  a  spray  on-leave  in  conditioner  instead.   Just  mix your
conditioner  1  part conditioner to 5 parts water.  Put it in an empty hair
spray  container  and  spritz  it on instead.  This does not leave any oily
traces  in  your  hair  at  all...  in fact you can't even tell you did it,
except for the fact that the tangles come out wonderfully and your frizzies
get calmed down.  :)

              ____  __   ___
             //_// ((   //    // //
            (( ((  _)) ((__  (( ((
                  of the day

                          ,,.,
         .&%%%%%.         /.'
         $' '%%%&°._.-.  /_/
          )^ ((%%%.-.  _/|   ____
          \__  |%%%   / \|  '|_|_'
           __) ))%%--' __/  /\o _)
          / /_/*(,..--'     | .'
       __/ (* * /   _     .'\/
 \|_\ /\  / \* (__ / \___/  /
  \__')__/   \_/* ' */   _.'
          mrf| * */* \_.'
             |*_* *__/
            /* * */
            \_/\_/
              \  |
               \ |
                ( \
                 | \
                 |__)
                  \ |
                _.' o\       .  '. . ' .
               (______)     , ' .' '
           ___._||__||_.__.'.'' ._'____

Note: If you're on the MOTD mailing list and want to unsubscribe, just mail me 
and let me know, and your address will be removed.