* * * * *
                                        
          From the “I'm doing this so you don't have to” department …
                                        
I should know better. But alas, one of the latest virtual gewgaws a friend
sent me via MyFaceSpaceBook intrigued me enough to click on it. Yes, sign me
up for this MyFaceSpaceBook “application” and okay, I see what it is. Fine.
But right at the top of the page I see:

> **(2)** of your Friends Challenged you at the **IQ Quiz**
>  **(1)** of them thinks you are **dumb!**
> 
> Accept Challenge
> 

Alright, fine. I'm curious.

Click.

I'm taken off MyFaceSpaceBook to some other website that's asking some very
easy questions. I answer a bunch and have to type in my phone number to get
to my results. No way I'm doing that, so it's “555-555-1212” and …

More questions. And one of the questions leads off to yet another site asking
questions. I answer all those questions, answer for my phone number as “555-
555-1212” and got back “Thank you. We'll text your results.”

Heh. Good luck.

But the quiz that lead off to that quiz is still open. I type in my birthday,
and then I have to fill in all this personal information. It didn't like my
first name of “S”—apparently that's not a valid name. And it didn't like my
address of “123 Main St., Boca Raton.” When I typed in the address of The
Company, it somehow knew it wasn't a residential area and required an
apartment number. Oh, and it didn't like my phone number, so I made one up
(sorry to whomever that is).

Good lord!

Okay, fine.

Then a screen asking if I'm interested in any of the following optional
promotional items, select “Yes” or ”No” for each one. I answer “no” to each
one, and then I'm informed that I need to answer “yes” to at least one of
them.

So much for optional.

I pick one (I think it was for a motorized wheelchair) and get yet another
screen of “optional promotional items.” Same story, I have to select “yes” to
one of them. A third page of “optional promotional items.” This time, I
disable Javascript so I can answer ”no” in peace. Next page comes up saying I
need to enable Javascript and a “submit” button, and nothing else.

I can't get past this screen, so I re-enable Javascript, and hit “submit.”
Now I get a page asking for my preference for [DELETED-cancer sticks-DELETED]
cigarettes (really? Did I say “yes” to cigarettes?).

Sorry, I don't have one. I de-select the “I certify that I am of legal age”
checkbox and hit submit. I then get the following:

> There were errors in your submission:
> 
> * The 'Optin to Receive Mail' field is required
> * The 'USUAL BRAND of cigarettes' field is required
> * The 'Usual Brand Style' field is required
> * The 'USUAL BRAND menthol?' field is required
> * The 'USUAL BRAND of cigarettes 2' field is required
> 
> Electronic Signature*
> 
> Please enter your name and address as they appear on your driver's license
> or official ID:
> 
> 

No! While yes, I am of legal age to consume tobacco products, I do not want
to receive offers, premiums, and/or coupons from a tobacco company. And yes,
I do understand that giving false information in order to accept these offers
may constitute a violation of law, but I don't want the offers! I just want
my results.

There simply is no way on this page to say “No thank you.” So therefore, I am
unable to continue, and get my results.

Oh, and the quiz?

It's the “How [DELETED-Smart-DELETED] DUMB Are You?” quiz.

Sigh.

To my MyFaceSpaceBook peeps: I love ya, but I'm simply going to ignore all
virtual gewgaws from now on. Just saying … 


Email author at sean@conman.org

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