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I bring you a welcome gift with a sharp point that you may remember me
This Ancient Roman Souvenir Stylus Is Inscribed With a Corny Joke
posted by chavenet on Jun 30, 2024 at 12:42 PM
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The genesis of the Novelty Pen!
posted by Greg_Ace at 1:01 PM
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The stylus was uncovered during an excavation effort centered on a now-lost tributary of the Thames
maybe they didn't get the point
posted by HearHere at 1:21 PM
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SEE!
posted by clavdivs at 1:21 PM
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Romans invented the cheap souvenir?
posted by tommasz at 1:27 PM
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The stylus was uncovered during an excavation effort centered on a now-lost tributary of the Thames
The river of skulls.
posted by pracowity at 1:30 PM
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SEE!
see the point? oh yeah, i guess that's the idiom [wiki] *sharpens stylus* back to the drawing board...
posted by HearHere at 1:40 PM
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I hate to say bad things about the Smithsonian, but would it have killed them to just tell us what the inscription says, in Latin? It's the best-known dead language in the world. This article feels more like repost-bait "content" than a piece of pop science.
posted by Harvey Kilobit at 2:01 PM
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""I have come from the City. I bring you a welcome gift with a sharp point that you may remember me. I ask, if fortune allowed, that I might be able (to give) as generously as the way is long (and) as my purse is empty"
SEE!
see the point? oh yeah, i guess that's the idiom [wiki] *sharpens stylus* back to the drawing board.
I'm fairly sharp, but not sharp enough to read the comment, to type see, all in 20 seconds and post it
posted by clavdivs at 2:19 PM
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Look, you're lucky I didn't get the strigil.
posted by Phanx at 2:29 PM
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The stylus was uncovered during an excavation effort centered on a now-lost tributary of the Thames
Of course! The stylus was taken from a bank.
posted by Smart Dalek at 2:36 PM
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would it have killed them to just tell us what the inscription says, in Latin?
Bit rot strikes again. The first link in the Smithsonian article is to the MOLA blog post which originally had the latin inscription. The problem is that the article is from 2019 and the MOLA blog post has vanished. Archive.org has it though. Per Dr Roger Tomlin it reads:'ab urbe v[e]n[i] munus tibi gratum adf(e)ro
acul[eat]um ut habe[a]s memor[ia]m nostra(m)
rogo si fortuna dar[e]t quo possem
largius ut longa via ceu sacculus est (v)acuus'
'I have come from the City. I bring you a welcome gift
with a sharp point that you may remember me.
I ask, if fortune allowed, that I might be able (to give)
as generously as the way is long (and) as my purse is empty.'
posted by RichardP at 2:51 PM
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You can always count on Roman stylusness.
posted by GenjiandProust at 3:25 PM
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Considering how the Romans were, I'm half surprised it wasn't shaped like a penis. Maybe the gift shop was sold out of those.
posted by biogeo at 8:41 PM
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Of course! The stylus was taken from a bank.
posted by Smart Dalek
ArgentariumUrbis aka BankusDickus.
posted by zaixfeep at 11:56 PM
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"And when you donate 5 denarii to Roman Colosseum Public Spectacles, we'll send you a fabuous linen totebag with the colosseum 'SPQR' logo on one side and "I'd Fight Like a Gladiator for Public Media" on the other. And inside, a brand new Stylus with our Gladiator slogan inscribed -- a free bonus to reward you for your loyalty to our organization.
"For 5 more denarii, we'll throw in a copy of the latest Encyclopedia Britannica! It's only one parchment scroll at the moment, but the boffins at Stonehenge assure us the second scroll will be out soon, and we'll include it as soon as we get it and our scribes make copies!
"Remember, we're the only source for spectacle, combat, death and quality Londinivm drama and comedy plays you've come to expect. And we don't get a single libra from the Emperor or Senate -- they do stage the public executions and certain other Imperial programs. But we, CPS, we stage the rest and we are here because you make it possible. Now back to our play, Scroll 3 of BRIDGERTVS."
posted by zaixfeep at 12:28 AM
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This is utterly unsurprising.
The Roman Empire was sufficiently large, with shared language and currency, that it could support a tourism industry and there was an itinerary comparable to the Grand Tour. Some sites are still popular, such as Athens and Cairo, while others have been more-or-less forgotten.
Tony Perrottet wrote an extremely entertaining book in which he followed the route in the modern era, which was published under two titles: Route 66 AD and Pagan Holidays
At any rate, archaeologists have found loads of mass-produced souvenirs from these tourist traps all over the Roman Empire - miniature statue replicas of famous monuments, painted glass vials (almost like snowglobes). Street artists had nearly-complete paintings of local streetscapes, lacking only the faces of whichever tourists purchased them.
About the only form of modern tourist schlock not mentioned in the book were pre-printed tunics, though maybe they were simply flimsy enough materials that none survived.
posted by cheshyre at 7:33 AM
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Greg_Ace: The genesis of the Novelty Pen!
Hold it upside down and the lady's toga falls off!
posted by dr_dank at 1:47 PM
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Those "special feature" stylii cost an extra quadrans.
posted by Greg_Ace at 3:06 PM
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and the lady's toga falls off!
Ahem, ladies did not wear togas. You're thinking of a stola, a much more feminine garment, we can all agree.
posted by GenjiandProust at 4:36 PM
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so...the novelties dr_dank describes would be stola styli?
posted by Greg_Ace at 4:53 PM
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This is not the Forum for puns like these.
posted by dr_dank at 4:55 PM
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In that case I'll be Roman to one that is!
posted by Greg_Ace at 4:56 PM
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Greg_Ace, I accuse you of being weeny, weedy, and weaky!
posted by GenjiandProust at 5:19 PM
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Hey I just column as I see 'em! I can't help it if Jove blessed me with a Doric-y sense of humor.
posted by Greg_Ace at 5:34 PM
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We've hit peak Dorko-Roman culture, here, barring someone making a "semper ubi sub ubi" joke. ...dammit.
posted by GenjiandProust at 8:35 AM
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Nullus Anxietas, GenjiandProust!
posted by Greg_Ace at 9:08 AM
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