Transcript: EastEnders - 20 Dec 1994 The Television Transcript Project */EastEnders /* *Written by:* Helen Blizzard 20 Dec 1994 British Air Date: Tuesday, 20 Dec 1994. (Aired in Denver, CO, USA: 19 Nov 1996.) This is episode #110 in the second numbering series (after the first 952 episodes). *Synopsis:* Janine and Natalie are depressed about their upcoming Christmases, so Natalie, Bianca, and Ricky propose a possible solution. David has fun with that. Art has a mostly blissful day with the family. Nellie plays up Jules' Christmas invitation for all it's worth. Ian is concerned about Gita's "toothache." Michelle confronts Phil--whenever Peggy's out of earshot--about Grant tormenting Sharon. Directed by Geoff Feld. Whist is a form of bridge (card game). A spanner is a wrench. Daft means crazy or foolish. Boxing Day is the day after Christmas. The Cockney English noun, "punter" means a customer. A "quid" is a pound (money). A "bed sit" is a very small apartment. "Cheers" means thank you or good-bye (and is sometimes a toast). To be "chuffed" is to be very pleased. To "keep shtoom" is to keep mute, absolutely quiet. "Blimey!" (or "Blimey O'Reilly!") is an expression of surprise. (Note: "eh" is usually pronounced "Ay," like the name of the letter A, especially when at end of a sentence/question. Eh?) Braces {} enclose unclear speech. CHELLE = MICHELLE = CHELLE NAT = NATALIE = NAT KATH = KATHY = KATH About 27 scenes. 24 characters: ART, PAULINE, MARTIN, PAT, JANINE, DAVID, SANJAY, CINDY, MICHELLE, SHARON, SONIA, CAROL, ALAN, RICKY, STEVE, NELLIE, BIANCA, NAT, KATHY, GITA, IAN, STEVEN, PEGGY, and PHIL. Cast list (cast.htm 3K) Note: After Phil needed brain surgery, Grant had come and waited by his bed and was there alone in the middle of the night when Phil woke up. Then Grant got Phil to say Sharon forced herself on him and he couldn't say no. Now they can be good old brothers again. When I printed this, it took 35 pages. Transcribed via microcassette and copious notes. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [*/EastEnders/ Intro* with theme music (time: 00:27). Intro theme: Save music (417kb mp3).] ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [It's early morning. Day after previous episode (Grant's drunken night upstairs with two other people).] [The Fowlers' living room. ART comes in and sits eating at table, PAULINE is sitting on the floor to left of him by the old fireplace and in front of the Christmas tree. MARTIN is standing toward the other side of it, decorating it.] ART Here we are. Breakfast is served. PAULINE Well. Finished. What do you think? ART I'll never get into it. PAULINE Oh, silly. ART [chuckles] PAULINE Come here, Martin. Aye-ah! Perfect. ART Where's his halo, then? PAULINE His what? ART His halo--for Joseph. PAULINE [to MARTIN] Was I supposed to make you a halo? MARTIN I don't know. PAULINE See, Joseph doesn't /wear/ a halo, does he? ART 'Course he wears an halo. He's /ho/ly, isn't he? PAULINE Is he? ART 'Course he is; they're /all/ holy, i'n' they? PAULINE [to MARTIN] Look, try an' remember. Were you supposed to have an halo or not? ART Look. Mary, Joseph, an' Jesus: they /all/ wear halos! PAULINE Ohhhh. I better go /find/ one, then haven't I? ART [to MARTIN] Yeah, you go an' get your bag ready, son. Otherwise you'll be late. [MARTIN goes upstairs and PAULINE's gone to the kitchen. ART calls to her.] ART Hey. When does this play start? PAULINE Three o'clock. ART Oh, I thought I might pop along. It's not everyday you get to see your son play Joseph, is it? PAULINE Ah, actually, ah [comes back in] I thought we might ask Auntie Nellie; you know how much she misses Martin. ART Oh, have you mentioned it? PAULINE Weeks ago. ART Oh. Well, she's probably forgotten about it. Look, why don't--just you an' me go? An' then we can go out for tea afterwards--just the three of us. As a treat. What d'you say? PAULINE Oh, I think that's a lovely idea, Arthur! ART We should /do/ more things as a family, now we're on our own. PAULINE Yeah. Arthur? ART Mmm? PAULINE About Christmas. ART Oh yeah, I'm really looking /for/ward to that. Mind you the house'll be full won't it, what with us an' the kids. It's Vicky--that'd be six. An' Nellie--seven. An' this table's gonna be a bit cramped, i'n't it? [PAULINE's face got a grateful look. She's sitting at the table.] PAULINE Oh. [kisses him on cheek] ART What's that for? PAULINE You're a lovely man. Do you know that, Arthur? ART [amused] Wha. PAULINE Nellie! ART Oh! Well, she's /fam/ily, isn't she? PAULINE I tell you what-- ART Mm. PAULINE Why don't we ask her out for a drink. An' invite her, you know, properly. Make her feel wanted. ART As long as it doesn't stretch into Boxing Day, it's fine by me. PAULINE All right. Here--what'd you think. [holding a big-ish wire strainer over her head] ART What you holdin' that for? PAULINE Well, it's a halo. Take the middle out an' hey-presto! ART [disgusted] That's /daft,/ that is! Better go down the shed and make one--I'm not gonna have a son of mine play Joseph with a--a sieve on his head! An' that's that. [gets up to go to the shed] ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [The Butchers' kitchen. It's still early morning. PAT, JANINE, and DAVID at their little table eating. JANINE's sad and quiet.] PAT What's the /matter,/ love? I thought you'd be jumping up and down for /joy!/ Last day of school. Christmas holiday's coming up. JANINE [quiet] Nothing to look forward to, is there? PAT [encouraging] Well, of course there is, /darling!/ I'm takin' ya Christmas shopping, aren't I, remember? JANINE I don't wanna go. 'S no point. DAVID What kinda attitude's that, Janine. We gettin' too big for the {fair now we're grown}, are we? JANINE You think he might surprise us, Pat, an' come back for Christmas? [she /is/ depressed] PAT Um. No, I don't think so, love. JANINE I thought that he cared about us. DAVID Listen, darling. I tell you what we do, eh? This afternoon, after school, I come an' pick you up in that posh new motor of mine, yeah? An' we go an' buy you something really special. How about that? Well just tell me what you /want,/ then!? JANINE [tearful] I want Dad an' Ricky to be here for Christmas, that's what I want! [rushes upstairs] [PAT wants to follow her.] DAVID Leave her, leave her, Mum. Leave her. PAT David, she's upset. DAVID Best left alone. PAT No, she /isn't!/ DAVID Look, you left me on me own an' /I/ had to get on with it! [calms, resigned] Mom, why don't you invite Bianca an' Ricky on Christmas day, eh? What's stoppin' ya? PAT [sighs] ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [The market. CINDY comes up with the baby stroller to SANJAY. He admires the kids and gets up.] SANJAY I remember Sharamila at that age. CINDY Yeah. I bet she didn't scream as much as /these/ two, though. SANJAY I can't imagine havin' two--I mean one's a full-time job in itself. CINDY Yeah. Tell me about it. SANJAY They're worth it, aren't they? CINDY Yeah. SANJAY So what're you doin' out so early? CINDY Well, I have a few things to catch up on, you know, and, uh--have you seen /Gi/ta? I went 'roun' the flat an' she wasn't there. SANJAY Oh, you just missed her. She's gone off to order some new stock. She won't be back for a few hours. CINDY A few /hours./ SANJAY Yeah, it was important? CINDY Noooo. Ah. It's just I wanted a word. SANJAY Hey, you two still doing swimmin' then. CINDY [nervous] Yeah.. Why? SANJAY Nothing. Gita was just sayin' how much she enjoyed it. CINDY Oh! SANJAY You two should go again. You never know; I might join you next time, eh? CINDY [smartly] Sorry. Mum's only. [leaves smiling] ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [Upstairs at the Vic. SHARON and MICHELLE come into the kitchen. SHARON looks terrible and is still in her pink robe. MICHELLE's stopped by. They sit.] MICHELLE Just thought I'd pop up, to see how you are. SHARON Yeah. Thanks for last night, 'Chelle. Appreciate it. MICHELLE Did you sleep? SHARON Not a lot. MICHELLE There wasn't any more trouble after I left, was there? SHARON No. Nothing--He was dead to the world. Still is, I hope. MICHELLE Oh, Sharon, what're ya gonna do? SHARON I just don't know anymore, 'Chelle. I can't go on like this. [breathes in and gets louder, angry] You know I thought this would all stop when I told him I signed those papers. MICHELLE What's gonna happen when he finds out you haven't? Oh. Sharon, you don't have to put up with this; nobody does! SHARON Oh, God, how'm I gonna stop him, eh? ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [The Jacksons' kitchen. Still early morning. SONIA and ALAN are at the table. CAROL is drying the dishes. Pretty happy scene.] SONIA An' they'll /really/ be here for Christmas, then? CAROL Yeah! It'd be great, wouldn't it? Be like a full house. SONIA It'd be a bit squashed, won't it? CAROL Well, I thought you'd be pleased Ricky an' Bianca were coming. SONIA Well, I am! But.. uh.. it's been great since Bianca's been gone. I don't /wanna/ share my room again. CAROL [as she comes over to her] Oh! This is what this is all about, is it? No, course not. They're just comin' for the day, i'n't they, mm? [kisses her head] SONIA Oh! In that case, I'll go an' tell Gran an' Billy. [is up, turns at the door] I hope you bought us a big enough turkey. You'll really be in trouble, won't ya? [leaves] ALAN [chuckles] She's sharp as a tack, that girl! CAROL Alan, what /are/ we gonna do? ALAN No worries. I'll have a word in Big Ron's ear. He's got a mate who's doin' a deal with some, uh, neat turkeys. CAROL Oh, yeah. ALAN Yeah, straight up! Half the retail price! All Quality stuff! CAROL I should /hope/ so! ALAN Trust me. It's gonna be a /good/ Christmas. CAROL [is standing by him and he gets up and kisses her head] Mm. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [The Arches. RICKY is coming out from the bin because PAT's just walked in. He's got the radio playing pop music.] RICKY 'Ello Pat. PAT Busy? RICKY Yeah, I ain't stopped. Look, Pat, I'm, I'm sorry about the other night. PAT It's hardly /your/ fault, is it? I'm glad Bianca came back, though. I just hope for the bet--you're not afraid to come around the house again. RICKY No of course not! PAT Well; things are coming up {close} for you at last, aren't they? 'Bout time an' all. Got a nice little earner, here, your own place, a lovely girlfriend-- RICKY You /mean/ that? PAT Who you're obviously /crazy/ about. I know we got off on the wrong foot, that's all. Mind you that mother of hers is a different kettle of fish /all/ together. RICKY [cautious, quiet] She came around. PAT Eh? RICKY [cautious] Her an' Alan, ah, came around last night. PAT You're kiddin'? After the display /she/ put on the other day? RICKY [fast] Look, she said she was sorry, I mean, she said things are gonna be /diff/erent from now on. PAT For you, maybe. But her an' me go back too /far/ for that--anyway, I didn't come 'round here to discuss Carol Jackson! It's Janine I'm worried about. RICKY Why--wwhat's /hap/pened? PAT [pause] Poor kid. She was in such a /state/ this morning I just had to come 'round here and ask ya-- RICKY Well, ask me what-- PAT Will you come over for Christmas Day? Well, her Dad's disappeared, you've moved out; please say you'll come, Ricky--an' it's /not/ just for her. I'd like it an' all. It wouldn't be the /same/ without you. RICKY [difficult situation] The thing is, Pat, I'm, see, I--I /want/ to, I mean, it's, but we-- PAT What? RICKY Well, well we've already said yes to someone else. PAT [disappointed] Oh. RICKY Carol Jackson invited us. PAT [thrown for a loop, stunned] /What?/ RICKY She asked us last night. PAT [now angry] An' she comes before /fam/ily, does she? Well, I'll let /you/ tell Janine that, shall I? [as she leaves, appeals to him] Think about it. RICKY [what a spot!] Uh! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [Close up of a sink and a bottle of pills. It's SHARON getting a glass of water. Medium shot of the Vic kitchen, where she is--still in her pink robe, looking terrible. STEVE comes in, just up, in his maroon robe. SHARON heads for the coffee maker when she sees him.] SHARON Cuppa? STEVE Yeah. Cheers. SHARON Um. I'll make you some breakfast if ya fancy it. STEVE Uhm. Tea'll be fine. I didn't realize it was so late. SHARON Well, you probably needed some /sleep/ after last night, eh? STEVE Yeah, you could be right. SHARON I'm sorry about all the noise, Steve. STEVE [breathes in] What time did you get to bed? SHARON Can't remember. STEVE What 'appened? SHARON Don't wanna know. STEVE You all right? SHARON Don't ask. [gives him some tea, sits down] STEVE Cheers. SHARON Steve. I know things have been pretty rough-going lately--livin' here, I mean. You won't /leave,/ will ya? Look, I know it's a lot to put up with, but /please;/ you won't go. STEVE Nah, of course not. SHARON [relieved, grateful] Ah! Thanks Steve. 'Preciate it. [gets up] [STEVE has been nice but now that he's said that, and her back is turned, he's got a tired look on his face.] ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [Launderette. PAULINE's working. NELLIE's stopped by. A woman is doing laundry in the background.] PAULINE Actually, Auntie Nellie, um, I wanted to have a /word/ with you about something-- NELLIE Ohh! I haven't forgotten, you know! PAULINE 'Bout what. NELLIE Martin's school nativity play! I put it straight down in my diary soon as you told me. PAULINE Oh, yeah, that--that-- NELLIE I'm /really/ looking forward to it tomorrow. PAULINE This afternoon. NELLIE It's not, is it? Ooo, I don't know how that could 'ave happened. I've got a /whist/ drive this afternoon. PAULINE Oh that's a /shame!/ NELLIE I'll have to cancel. I can't get locked 'n' down, now, can I? PAULINE Oh, no! Don't worry, I'm sure Martin'll understand! NELLIE He'd be so disappointed. PAULINE Well, actually, his teacher said that he was so nervous that the fewer people there are there, the better. NELLIE Oh, the poor little lamb. Well, maybe it's just as well. PAULINE Yeah--[polite, nice] Um. Anyway, look: why don't we meet up for a drink. Um. Tonight, say 7:30 at the Vic, because, ah--well there's something Arthur and I want to /ask/ you. NELLIE Oh! That would be very nice, Pauline. It'll have to be an early one, though 'cause Jules is cooking-- PAULINE If it's incon/ven/ient-- NELLIE No! No! /I'll/ be /there,/ heh. [smiling as she's leaving] Be /really nice/ to see you both, heh. Bye! PAULINE Bye. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [The Cafe: NAT's working, behind counter. BIANCA's come in to ask her over. NAT's subdued.] BIANCA Look, I'm wonderin' if you might wanna come around for tonight for a {manicure and ?}. I'd love for you to come around. NAT No thanks, I'm booked up. BIANCA You're kidding! NAT Think about it. BIANCA Well, come on, Nat! Don't be like this! NAT Like what? BIANCA I don't know what's got /in/to you! You're a right Misery Gus, do you know that? NAT If I could just get my own place; might be all /right/ leavin' home. BIANCA Well, it's easy: just go an' look for one! NAT Oh, easy for /you,/ you mean. I mean, things just seem to fall in your lap! Not all of us get away with not payin' any rent, /do/ we? [BIANCA sits at a table as RICKY comes in. He's preoccupied and upset.] BIANCA What's the matter with /you?!/ RICKY [sighs] I had Pat 'round this morning 'id'n' I? She invited us for Christmas! BIANCA What?! N--No, I ain't lettin' my Mum down now--she'd go bananas! RICKY Yeah and in meantime Janine's havin' a breakdown being left all alone. BIANCA Uh, I can't believe this. We can't win, /couldn't/ we? NAT [comes up, quietly] {?? pingpong??} Get 'em all together. RICKY What? NAT Well that should make for a merry old Christmas, shouldn't it? BIANCA Thanks a bunch, Nat. RICKY Tell you what, that ain't a bad idea, you know. BIANCA Oh, come on! There's /no way!/ RICKY Yeah, but it's a /solution/ i'd'n' it? BIANCA They'd /never/ agree to it, though!! RICKY Well, there's no other /way, is/ there? What /else/ we gonna do? BIANCA What? You mean just go an' /tell/ 'em? RICKY Well, yeah! Why not? It's about /time/ they buried the 'atchet, eh--yah--Look, we can go around Pat's tonight-- BIANCA Yes, I have to sort Mum an' Alan out. It ain't gonna be /easy,/ though. RICKY [amused and relieved, getting up] Well, huh, it's up to /them,/ i'n't it--if they want to /see/ us. BIANCA Where're you goin' now? RICKY Goin' out to see Sanjay. I'm gonna tell him we're gonna start payin' rent from now on. BIANCA You what?! RICKY Look, Bianca, I felt /awful/ takin' that money off your mum! Should never have pretended I was payin' it! BIANCA I was only stickin' /up/ for ya! RICKY Yeah, well it's up to /me/ to put things straight, i'n' it?! BIANCA You're /mad,/ you are! /No one/'d find out! Anyway, we could save up that money an' {come like a romantic holiday} Reckon? RICKY Oh, it'll have to wait. [leaving] BIANCA Oh, /charm/ing. [RICKY's left and KATH comes in.] KATH I'm sorry I'm so late. Loo--why don't you take a break, eh? NAT Oh! Cheers, Kath. [brings a tea for BIANCA] Here, I thought you might like another one on the 'ouse. BIANCA Oh, thanks, Nat! NAT Uh. About tonight: maybe I will come around, after all. BIANCA [hasn't the patience] NAT All right, I won't. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [Out on the market. SANJAY's stall. DAVID comes over.] SANJAY [to a punter] You gonna look slick. See ya. DAVID You're lookin' pleased with yourself. SANJAY Fifth one today. Must be my new after shave, eh? DAVID Must be your lucky day. [hands him Bianca's rent] How /is/ everything over the road--all right? SANJAY Fine. Why? DAVID An' you got rid of all those cockroaches, I take it. SANJAY Oh, yeah. All dealt with. DAVID Yeah. You better /have/ done. Because, uh, otherwise I'll take you down the Rent Control Bureau. And don't spend it all at /once./ [leaves] RICKY [running over] Hey Sanjay! Look--I--just want a word, it's about the bed sit. SANJAY Loo-I'll, uh, sort those cockroaches out as soon as I can, all right? RICKY No, no! It's not about them. Look--you, uh, you've been /brilliant/ lettin' us stay there for free. SANJAY No sweat, mate. RICKY But listen, uh, I'm /earnin'/ now, so you'll be gettin' some rent off us, right? I'll settle up with you tomorrow if that's all right. SANJAY Ricky. Ricky, I don't want it. Why don't we just /leave/ things /as/ they are. RICKY No, it's not fair! SANJAY What's not fair? RICKY Well, why should everyone /else/ pay an' not us!? You know, that ain't /on,/ mate! [earnest] Listen, thanks anyway, but you're gettin' it whether you like it or not, all right? [leaves] [SANJAY looks half annoyed/worried, half opportunistic.] ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [The Launderette. PAULINE's talking to CAROL as they fold sheets. PAULINE's talking about Sharon just as MICHELLE walks in the door. It's as if MICHELLE heard right away that Sharon's the topic of the conversation and that PAULINE's /not/ sympathetic.] PAULINE I've known Sharon for years; I'd be the /last/ person to turn my back on her--I don't care if he /is/ muckin' her about--I think she's brought /all/ this on herself-- MICHELLE Oh so that means he can treat her like a piece of dirt, does it? Mum, if you could /see/ what he's doin' to her, it's /sick/ening! Oh, but it's all right if he /totally/ humiliates her because, after all, she's brought it on herself, i'n't she? [has said her piece, leaves in disgust] ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [SANJAY's stall. NAT's looking at stuff, still is down.] SANJAY All right? Look, it's just come in. Bargain at twenty quid. NAT Actually, I wasn't looking for a dress. Um, I was just wondering, well, inquiring, like--have you got any bed sits free? SANJAY What? For you? NAT Yeah, {my mum's just being demanding.} SANJAY No, I'm afraid not. Look, I'm telling you, you're best off where you are. I mean, the last place I wanna be on Christmas Day is in one of /those./ I can't think of anything more depressing. NAT [sadly, flatly] I can. [heads on her way] [NAT walking. GITA passes her, from the opposite direction. GITA's cheerful.] GITA All right, Natalie? NAT Yeah. Why shouldn't I be? GITA Oh, nothing, you just look fed up, that's all. NAT Oh, sorry. [sarcastic, fake cordial, smile] Betta? [continues on, so does GITA] GITA [comes up to the stall] Hi. SANJAY All right? {Look at that.} Did everything go all right? GITA /Great./ I got some great new stock an' a wonderful price on it. SANJAY All right. Well, we can go through all of this now if you like. I mean, I'll get someone to cover. GITA I can't. I've gotta go pick Sharamila up. But, uh, how about later on this evening? We could meet for a drink? 7:30 in the Vic? SANJAY Yeah, great. GITA [cheerful, turns to leave] See you later, then. SANJAY Oh Gita. GITA [turns] Yes? SANJAY Uh, Cindy was looking for you. GITA Oh? Do you know what it was about? SANJAY No, but she seemed up/tight,/ though, whatever it was. GITA Right. Okay. [continues on her way and IAN's in the market, too.] Oh Ian! Where's Cindy? IAN Uh. She's gone shopping with the kids. GITA Oh, well, when you see her, will you tell her I'm back? Apparently she's been looking all over for me. IAN [a bit preoccupied, isn't really stopping] All right, will do. [stops, calls back to GITA. They're a bit far apart now] Oh! Gita!? GITA Yeah? IAN How's your teeth? GITA Eh? IAN [pointing at his teeth] HOW ARE THEY? Oh! Never mind. [continues on his way] [GITA confused and amused, watches IAN go on.] ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [In the cafe.] KATH [giving NAT some money] Here you go. Go on, take off. NAT What's that for? KATH Call it a /Bonus./ Go on! NAT Cheers, Kath! [CHELLE's just come in and NAT lingers, listening.] CHELLE Um. Quick word with you Kathy? Um. Do you know how Phil's doing? KATH Well, I went to see him yesterday. Can't say it was easy. CHELLE Don't suppose it was. KATH Still, he's being well looked after, i'n't he? CHELLE Yeah, well, I--I's just wonderin' if you could give me Peggy's address? I thought I might send him a Christmas card. KATH Yeah, yeah, 'course you can have it. [fishes for paper and pencil and writes it down] CHELLE Cheers. An' I /might/ not want to-- KATH No, go on. CHELLE Thank you. [is leaving] KATH Fine. [turns back to work] NAT [quietly] Um. 'Chelle. CHELLE Yeah? NAT I couldn't help overhearin' an' I--I--I just wondered, well, you couldn't give /me/ Peggy's address, could ya? Loo--I just wanted to give him a card, you know, cheer him up a bit. Let him know we're thinking of him. Must be lonely on his own, eh? CHELLE [hands her the address and NAT uses her order pad to copy it] {What--on his own}, he's got Kath. NAT Yeah, but he's there an' she's here. A bit odd, that, i'n't it? CHELLE Is it? NAT Yeah, well, you--you'd a thought she'd gone an' looked after him. Don't ya think? CHELLE [dumbfounded, unbelieving, half out of it] No. I think that you should just get on with the job that you get /paid/ to do. [takes the paper, and leaves her with a look] NAT [has the rest of the address in her head] ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [Evening, the Butchers' dining room. The doorbell rings, DAVID gets it, brings in RICKY and BIANCA. During this scene, DAVID remains standing with them. PAT and JANINE are seated at the dinner table. At the start, RICKY and BIANCA come in from the hall, DAVID following them.] DAVID Mum's in the ah, uh, all right. PAT Ricky. Oh always a lovely surprise, isn't it darling? Want some {coffee first}? Do you-- RICKY No, I'm all right. We're ah, we're not stopping. PAT Oh, right. RICKY Listen, ahhh. Me an' Bianca have been discussing Christmas, an', we've come up with a solution. [pauses, nervous] PAT Yeah? DAVID [quiet] What's that then? RICKY Well, we all spend it together, don't we? [to the stunned silence] What d'you think? JANINE Does that mean I'll see you on Christmas Day? RICKY Yeah, that's right! You'll see me, Pat, David, Bianca an' all /her/ family-- BIANCA An' everyone's happy, i'n't they? RICKY Yeah. Well? PAT [breathes in] What's Carol have to say about this? BIANCA Well, she said to come an' check with you first to make sure it was all right, didn't she? RICKY Yeah, yeah--that's right. PAT Oh, /did/ she now? RICKY Well? PAT [breathes in] If it's the only way I'll get to see you over Christmas, I'm willing to give it a try. [RICKY and BIANCA are pleased.] DAVID Well, I think it's a great idea! The Butchers an' Jacksons all under one roof. Couple glasses of Mum's punch, we'll all be doing the hokey-pokey around the living room! Well, I'm dashing over to the Vic for a half an hour. See you later. [takes off] RICKY All right. PAT Well, listen, you two. There's one thing I'm not budging on, do you hear me? RICKY What's that? PAT Gonna be Christmas in this house. [final, that's that] I've ordered the turkey, I'm gonna make {big rolls}, an' I'm the one who's gonna be cookin' it. Okay? [RICKY and BIANCA exchange relieved yet anxious looks.] ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [At Ian's and Cindy's, same night. The living room. CINDY's on the couch. They have a small Christmas tree to the side. No kids in sight. IAN gives her a drink.] CINDY Oh! Cheers! IAN Right. Now you stay there, an' I'm gonna go {bath} the twins, all right? [going] CINDY All right. IAN Oh! I nearly forgot, I bumped into Gita this afternoon. CINDY [anxious] Did you? IAN Yeah, she was asking me what did you wanted to see her about. CINDY Oh, I do? IAN Oh, well she obviously thinks you do. You all right? CINDY Yeah! Fine! IAN Hey, listen. Why don't you, ah, go with her swimming again tomorrow? I mean I'll, /baby/-sit for you. I was going to mention it to you but I completely forgot. Why don't you give her a call? Ask her. CINDY No. It's a nice thought, but not to worry. IAN Oh! Why not? It'd do you /good!/ CINDY No, uh, I think I might have a bit of a chill coming on. Best to leave it, you know, just in case. [IAN leaves and CINDY's got something on her mind.] ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [The Vic. It's crowded that night. CAROL and ALAN are at the bar and DAVID is going over to them, stands behind and between them.] DAVID [as he's coming through the crowd] Hello mate? All right? All right mate? [up to CAROL and ALAN] Oh! I'm /glad/ I bumped into you two! Here, let me get you a drink. You bet. Well, it's something to celebrate tonight, i'n't it? CAROL What are you on about? DAVID [grins] We're all gonna be One Big Happy Family. CAROL You on some sort of medication? DAVID [dumb pause act] Oh, I /see!/ You've not been told, oh, uh. I thought you had. Yeah, Ricky an' Bianca have been at our house tonight. An' they've been discussing the arrangements for Christmas Day an' they've come up with this marvellous idea that we'll all spend it together! ALAN /All/ of us. DAVID Blimey, he's quick, i'n' he? I can /see/ the attraction. CAROL An' this was /their/ idea, was it? DAVID Yeah! They're uh, they're over there organizing the party games now. We've got, uh, Sweepity-Sweep, Blind Man's Bluff, a couple o' rounds of Musical Chairs an' that's all before lunch. [more but indecipherable--CAROL's talking over him by now] CAROL An'--an' Pat's agreed to this, has she? DAVID Yeah! She's on the phone now, orderin' more party crackers. [cheery] So. What you both havin'? ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [Still in the Vic. ARTHUR and PAULINE are in a booth.] ART I really enjoyed myself this afternoon, you know. PAULINE Oh, yeah. I felt /so proud/ when Martin came on an' made his speech to Mary an' the Wise Men. ART [chuffed] Yeah. You could hear a /pin/ drop in that hall, couldn't ya. PAULINE An' all of the kiddies' faces when they sang that song to Mary and Joseph. ART Yeah. I think they could o' gotten a better Baby Jesus, though. PAULINE What cha' mean? ART Didn't you /see?/ When they picked it up out o' the crib, it's /leg/ fell off! PAULINE [amused] Oh! Arthur, /don't!/ ART Yeah--did you see Martin--as quick as a shot, he went an' grabbed it, an' hid it behind his back! It was lovely, really lovely. [proud, chuffed] Ha, ha, ha. [PAULINE pecks him on the cheek] Oh! What was that for? PAULINE That was for the lovely tea we had afterwards. ART Oh, yeah; we should do /that/ more /often!/ PAULINE [sees NELLIE looking for them and making her way through the crowd] Mm! Remember, not a word about Martin. ART [hushed] 'Course not, no. [NELLIE reaches them.] ART Hello, Nellie! [she sits] What can I get ya? NELLIE Oh, I won't; thank you. /Jules/ is doing some chops and I've got a crumble in the oven, heh, heh! Now! /What/ was it you wanted to /see/ me about? Now, if it's anything to do with the money, I've already told you, it doesn't matter any more, eh-- PAULINE But it's nothing to do with that at /all./ NELLIE [almost giddy] Oh! Eh! So what was it, then? ART Well, eh, we wanted to ask you if you'd got--come over for a quick drink or something, at Christmas. PAULINE [pause] What Arthur means is: we'd like you to come an' spend Christmas Day with us. NELLIE [a bit subdued but gracious] Oh. Thank you both, all the same, but, uh, /Jules/ has already asked me. I'll be spending the day with him. PAULINE But he always goes to /Nor/wich at Christmas, to his /son's./ NELLIE Not this time. He's got other plans. An' he wants /me/ to be part of them, eh. Sorry about that. Well. I better be gettin' back. /Jules/'ll be wonderin' where I've got to, heh. [standing] [as she's turning and leaving] The thought was appreciated all the same. Oh. Maybe if I get a moment, I might pop in for a quick hello, eh? PAULINE [stunned] I /can't/ believe it. She's actually /snubbed/ us! ART [pleased] Yeah! You know, every now and again, you get one of those /blissful/ days, when everything goes right. Do you know what I mean? PAULINE [not pleased with him] No, Arthur, I can't say as I do. ART Well, today's /one/ of 'em. Cheers: to a /very/ "Happy Christmas." Ha, ha! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [Same night. PEGGY's house. It's quite nice, seems sort of suburban. Doorbell rings. It's CHELLE.] CHELLE Hello again, Peggy. PEGGY Oh! Michelle! This is a nice surprise! CHELLE I'm, sorry to just turn up like this, I only just um-- PEGGY Oh! It's all right! Come on in. Oh, Phil'll be really pleased to /see/ ya. I'll just go an' /wake/ him. CHELLE Oh, no, don't dis/turb/ him-- PEGGY Oh, don't be daft! I was going to give him a shout anyway. Go on. Go on through. [confidentially] To be quite honest, he hasn't /had/ that many visitors. /Grant's/ been, of course. But you know what's funny? Kathy. /Only/ shown her face the once. Quick cup o' tea an' then she was /off/ again! And /as/ for Sharon, tsk, tsk. Well, I suppose she has a pub--somebody's got to keep an eye on things, haven't they? But you'd o' /thought/ she'd o' made the effort, /wouldn't/ ya? Huh, huh, ha; /I/ don' know. /All/ these women with their own businesses! Bit different in my day /I/ can tell you. If your old man was taken ill, you were expected to drop everything, an' that was that. Sit down, Michelle. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [At Ian's and Cindy's, the phone rings. IAN gets it and CINDY comes rushing in from the kids' room.] IAN Hello? Oh, hello Gita. Yeah--I-- [CINDY's taken the phone from behind, he says to her:] --It's all right, love. I was only going to ask her how she /was./ CINDY [on phone] 'Ello, Gita? Yeah--can you hold on a moment? Thanks. [to IAN] Ian, could you go an' finish off, uh, Steven's /sto/ry? He's asking for ya. IAN Yeah, all right. [goes with book she's handed him] CINDY [on phone] Hi, Gita? Yes sorry 'bout that. Um. /Look./ What I wanted to /ask/ you--hold on--/What?!/ IAN [has returned, went right to the couch with his paper] He's asleep. CINDY Uh. /Gi/ta. Look, it doesn't matter--no, no--uh, uh, I'll talk to you about it tomorrow. Oh, you goin' somewhere nice? All right then. Bye. [hangs up] IAN I don't know what's got /into/ you all of a sudden. CINDY Ian, he /can't/ be asleep! I only just /left/ him! IAN Wha--he was droppin' off /any/way! I mean, what does it /matter?/ Now come an' sit down an' rel/ax,/ eh? STEVEN [from kids' room] Daddy! Daddy! CINDY Wha--see what I mean?! Ian, he's /calling/ for you! Will you go an' finish off his /story,/ please?! IAN Uh. [puts paper aside] Do you /know/ something: you've been in a real /fun/ny mood /all day./ CINDY Ian, just /go/ will you?! IAN All right, all right! I'm going! I'm going. [leaves] STEVEN [from kids' room] /Da/ddy. CINDY Oh! [dials phone, waits as it rings] Oh, just be /in/ for God's sake, Gita, be /in./ [IAN comes back in, she hangs up] Uh! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [At the Vic. At the very start, it's DAVID moving through the crowd. Then the scene is of CAROL and ALAN at a little table.] DAVID Excuse me, ladies. CAROL I know just what /Pat's playin'/ at. Mm? She's only {done} this to show me up, isn't she? /Hasn't/ she?! ALAN Yeah! Yeah. CAROL 'Cause she's damn sure I'm gonna say, /"no,"/ an' put a spanner in the lot. Well. I'm gonna call her bluff, i'n' I? An' I'm gonna say, "yes." ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [Peggy's living room. MICHELLE's on the couch, PEGGY's come in and goes to the cabinet where there's liquor.] PEGGY You fancy a drink? Heh! You look as if you could /do/ with one. MICHELLE Yeah. Go on, then. Just a small one. PEGGY [looking at a bottle] /Blimey!/ It'll have to be! Where'd all /that/ go to? [sighs] See what it's /doin'/ to me? I mean, having one of /them/ home. I was /off/ the gin before all this. [pouring drinks] Anyway. Cheers. MICHELLE Cheers. [In the background is a flight of stairs and PHIL's coming down and toward the room.] PEGGY It's good for me blood pressure. Or so I keep tellin' me doctor. Ha ha. [PHIL's come in. MICHELLE stands up to greet him.] PHIL Hi. How ya doing'? I could murder a cup o' tea, Mum. PEGGY All right, love. Go on, sit down. Put your feet up. [to CHELLE] See what I mean? Do you fancy one? I'll even throw in a bit of cake. [leaves] [They use the opportunity to talk. Quietly.] PHIL I'll tell ya now: if you've got another letter from Sharon tucked away, you can forget it. MICHELLE No. No; she doesn't know I'm here. PHIL Then why ya come? MICHELLE [pauses to get the words right] Look, whatever happened between you two, she's, she's still the best friend I'll ever have, or ever likely to have. An' I can't just sit by an' do nothing. PHIL Why? What's goin' on? MICHELLE [pause] It's Grant. PHIL [sighs and sits back in his chair] MICHELLE Phil. Every chance he gets, he /torments/ an' hu/mil/iates her. He's /sick;/ you know that! An' she can't /take/ much more. I /mean/ it! PHIL [sighs, evades eye contact] MICHELLE Phil! PHIL What? MICHELLE Well say something. PHIL What'd you /want/ me to say? It's got nothing to do with /me/ has it? PEGGY [arriving, cheerful with two short round cakes] Here we /are,/ then. An' I baked it me/self./ ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [At the Vic. It's still crowded. SANJAY and GITA are at a small table. He's got this small sheaf of papers he's conscientiously distracted by.] GITA I'm telling you, Sanjay, you're gonna be /really pleased./ I got such a good deal on all this new stock. Just wait 'til you /see/ it! SANJAY Yeah. You know you could 'ave had a string of shops by now if, oh-- GITA If what? SANJAY Well, if ya hadn't o' got mixed up with the likes of me. GITA [amused] Never a truer word was said. SANJAY No, I mean it! GITA Oh, cheers, I'll drink to that! SANJAY Yeah. Cheers. [clink glasses, he keeps turning back to those papers] GITA You know, we could still make it happen. That string of shops. SANJAY Oh, yeah, yeah. GITA Yeah! I mean, we get on so much better now, don't we? Now that we've sorted everything out an' know ex/act/ly where we stand. Quite an /achieve/ment, really, isn't it? SANJAY /What/ is? GITA /You an' me,/ after all we've been through, to come out of it such good friends, eh? /And/ to have such a good working relationship! When, if we work hard, well, there's no /reason/ why we can't build up the /bus/iness, get a couple of shops. SANJAY Look, I must go. GITA But we've only just /got/ here. SANJAY Yeah, yeah, I'm sorry, but I've got a lot of stock to sort out an', uh, stock-taking, an' I've got /all/ this lot [slaps papers] to go through for tomorrow--check out the figures an' all that. GITA I've never known you so conscientious! SANJAY Well, we all change, don't we. GITA Are you sure you don't need any help? SANJAY No, I'll be all right. GITA Are you okay, Sanjay? SANJAY [puzzled] Yeah--w--why /shouldn't/ I be? ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [Peggy's. MICHELLE and PEGGY on the couch, PHIL on his chair. All just sitting there. Silence.] PEGGY [looking at her cakes, sighs] Well, I know it wasn't one of me /best./ MICHELLE Oh, no, no, no; it's lovely. Thank you. PEGGY [to PHIL] What's the /matter/ with you?! You lost your tongue or something?! You won't /get/ any more visitors if you carry on like /this!/ [sympathetic] You all right, love? PHIL Uh, I could do with a couple of aspirin, Mum. [PEGGY gets up and leaves the room. MICHELLE leans forward and speaks intently in a low voice to PHIL.] MICHELLE So that's it, is it? You're just goin' to /sit/ here an' pretend it's got nothing to do with /you?/ PHIL [leans forward] Now, /lis/ten to me, all right? Ain't we forgettin' one tiny little /de/tail in here? If she'd o' kept her mouth /shut,/ none o' this would've /happened,/ would it? MICHELLE If you hadn't o' slept with her in the /first/ place-- PHIL Yeah, all right--you think I'm proud of what I did, do ya? Look, I'm sorry--she /don't/ deserve it, whatever he's doin'. MICHELLE [urgently] He's takin' her /apart! That's/ what he's-- PHIL Yeah--all /right/--I get the /pic/ture, but-- MICHELLE But /what?!/ PHIL /That's it:/ Nothing. End of conversation. [sits back] MICHELLE [pause, takes this in a moment] Well that's the deal to get him /back,/ is it? He does what /ever/ the hell he likes an' you stand by an' do /noth/ing? PHIL [leans forward] /She/ an' I had an understanding: to keep /shtoom. She/ blew it an' now she's /just/ got to face the /con/sequences. MICHELLE Phil. All I'm /ask/ing is that you tell him to /back off!/ PHIL You, know, there was one point, where, [pause] where I really thought I was gonna die. An' I /want/ed to. An' then I woke up. An' there he was, just sittin' by the bed, waitin'. He'd been there all night. An' he gave me another chance. I didn't think he would. I thought I'd blown it. Well, I ain't gonna /risk/ that again. I'm sorry. [calm whisper] Not. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [The Vic. RICKY and BIANCA find CAROL's and ALAN's table and stand while talking to them. CAROL's ready, acting attentive.] RICKY All right? CAROL Oh! RICKY Mind if we join ya? CAROL No! No! Sit yourself down! Listen, what ya havin' ta drink? BIANCA Look, we wanted to /ask/ you something first-- CAROL Oh, what's that, then? BIANCA Well, it's /Janine./ She's been really upset. CAROL Well, what about? BIANCA /Christ/mas--she's got none of her /own/ family there, an', what with /us/ coming over to /you,/ she's really unhappy. CAROL Must be /hard/ on her, poor kid-- RICKY Exactly, see, that's what we're /thinking,/ Carol. Well, th--the thing is, all right-- BIANCA /Look,/ we /felt/ sorry for her so we've come up with an idea. CAROL Well what's /that,/ then? RICKY We'll all spend it to/ge/ther, then /everyone's/ happy, /ain't/ they?! CAROL Well! Seems like a sensible solution to me. RICKY Oh, that's /great./ CAROL An' /Pat's/ agreed to this, has she? BIANCA Yes! RICKY Yeah! CAROL [just as determined as Pat was] There's only one small condition. You tell Pat it's at our place. I've al/ready/ ordered the turkey an' I'm the one who's gonna be cookin' it. All right? [RICKY and BIANCA exchange anxious yet happy looks] ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [Peggy's. Apparently Peggy's figured out she needs to clear out. She's nowhere in sight. PHIL's standing by the window, his head in the maroon curtains and the white lace curtains closer by the window. MICHELLE's sitting on the couch. They keep their voices fairly low.] MICHELLE /Please,/ Phil. You said your/self/ she don't de/serve/ this! You /loved/ her once. PHIL Once. Not any more. [turns to face her] I told ya: I ain't losin' him. Not for you. Not for Sharon. Not for anyone. MICHELLE [gets up] Well. I thought she meant more than that. I was wrong. I'm sorry. PHIL Yeah. So am I. [MICHELLE leaves.] -boom- -boom- -boom-boom- ------------------------------------------------------------------------ [show's time: 27:00] [*Credit Roll* with theme music. Long version of exit theme: Save music (1mb mp3).] [time: 00:30; total with intro and credits: 27:57] ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Transcript of the *next* episode (the next Thursday) ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Return to the Television Transcript Project email Last Updated: 5 Feb 2000 This fan page is *for curiosity and fun* and is not intended to infringe on any copyright nor to encourage such. 1 [x] close This Page is an outdated, user-generated website brought to you by an archive.It was mirrored from Geocities at the end of October, 2009. For any questions concerning this page try to contact the respective author. (To report any malicious content send the URL to oocities(at gmail dot com). 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