[HN Gopher] Stamping the joy out of collectors
       ___________________________________________________________________
        
       Stamping the joy out of collectors
        
       Author : jasonhansel
       Score  : 94 points
       Date   : 2021-04-17 15:09 UTC (7 hours ago)
        
 (HTM) web link (notalwaysright.com)
 (TXT) w3m dump (notalwaysright.com)
        
       | readingnews wrote:
       | I think OP failed to realize there are 0011 kinds of people in
       | the world.                 0001) your average joe. He just wants
       | a stamp.            0010) You. You want some stamps, but you are
       | not "into it".            0011) Those guys at the store. 0001 and
       | 0010 are rubbish and   should not be speaking to them, for they
       | are elite stamp collectors, just like everyone else should be.
       | 
       | It is getting harder to just find people "into it". I am a hi-fi
       | enthusiast. I also have advanced degrees in EE and Physics, but I
       | try to not let that get in the way. Talking to people on hi-fi
       | forums seems MUCH harder than say, 10 years ago (and I never left
       | the forum). Now I am one of the silent lurkers.
       | 
       | My point is not to go "forums now suck", but I think that "real
       | collectors" are too extreme now... hrm, perhaps just like
       | everything else? Polarized?
        
         | TheAceOfHearts wrote:
         | A friend recently pointed out that fandoms are like a fractal,
         | and as you zoom in it becomes increasingly hardcore and
         | dedicated.
         | 
         | The next layer on your list is probably the stamp collector
         | that only loves a certain kind of stamp with some obscure
         | feature and will talk your ear off about it. Probably something
         | like how only the stamps made in a specific year by one company
         | are any good because they use a highly specialized glue which
         | really makes it the pinnacle of stamp technology. A real "they
         | just don't make em like they used to".
         | 
         | People become obsessed with things to such an extreme degree
         | that they end up drowning out anyone without an equivalent
         | level of dedication. It becomes a problem when people chose to
         | play status games instead of just enjoying their hobby.
        
           | nicbou wrote:
           | I noticed this with history. You can go from general history
           | to people who can tell you where a WW2 jeep engine was built
           | based on its serial number.
           | 
           | I also found that unlike with most hobbies, I find history
           | talk much more civilised all around. People are eager to
           | share, and generally willing to accept well-sourced
           | disagreement.
        
           | dehrmann wrote:
           | > A friend recently pointed out that fandoms are like a
           | fractal, and as you zoom in it becomes increasingly hardcore
           | and dedicated.
           | 
           | Almost everything is like that. Turtles...
        
           | HWR_14 wrote:
           | >People become obsessed with things to such an extreme degree
           | that they end up drowning out anyone without an equivalent
           | level of dedication. It becomes a problem when people chose
           | to play status games instead of just enjoying their hobby.
           | 
           | It's true in academia and in technical fields as well. As you
           | become an expert, details most people skip over become very
           | important parts of your day.
           | 
           | The real difference is between people who disdain you for not
           | knowing as much as they do about some issue, those who
           | enthusiastically try to educate you, and those who recognize
           | not everyone cares about it as much as they do and tries to
           | speak to whatever level you are at (or slightly above it if
           | you've expressed a desire to go deeper.)
        
         | tjr225 wrote:
         | It is the same thing in synth and guitar circles. Maybe now we
         | have just discussed all of these things as nauseum for so long
         | the only way to move the discussion forward is this
         | extremeness.
        
           | dehrmann wrote:
           | Which strap lock sounds best? I hear schallers don't resonate
           | well.
        
           | navbaker wrote:
           | I just found this out the hard way. After playing acoustic
           | for ~15 years, I decided my birthday this year was the time
           | to join the world of electric guitars. I joined several
           | guitar related FB groups, expecting them to be as civil as
           | the tabletop gaming groups I belong to (my other hobby). I
           | quickly found out how wrong I was, it seemed there was no
           | topic too mundane to turn into a mud slinging gate keeper
           | competition. Not sure what it is about musical instruments
           | that makes it that way.
        
             | pmiller2 wrote:
             | I own an electric cello that I occasionally play and used
             | to take lessons with. Back when I was looking for a
             | teacher, I had a hard time finding anyone who'd let me use
             | it during lessons. Most of them wanted me to rent a wooden
             | cello.
             | 
             | I get that there are a lot of bad electric cellos out
             | there, and there are some good electrics that are bad for
             | beginners. But, mine is a Yamaha SVC-100 [0]. It's a
             | professional-worthy instrument, even if most professionals
             | don't use it. It has all the correct touch points as a
             | regular cello, and it responds like a normal cello, so, as
             | far as learning goes, it's just fine.
             | 
             | With cello people, I think it's a sense of conservatism or
             | something. I didn't really want to rent an instrument, so,
             | I kept looking until I found someone who would just let me
             | play my own. The guy I found was amazing, and owned his own
             | electric. He also played cello in a rock band. I'm sure all
             | those other cello teachers were fine, but I had a blast
             | with this guy, and I'm glad I found him.
             | 
             | [0]: https://www.yamaha.com/en/about/innovation/collection/
             | detail...
        
         | kbenson wrote:
         | Some forums exemplify the long tail of hobby fanaticism. What
         | used to be a couple people in the back of the convention that
         | were hardcore is now a large group of those disparate people in
         | a forum.
         | 
         | Sometimes you have to find a different forum. That's also why
         | you'll see multiple subreddits for the same thing. They embody
         | different aspects of the topic and draw people that associate
         | with that aspect. Sometimes some of the same people in both,
         | but the purport themselves differently depending on where they
         | are.
        
         | bpcpdx wrote:
         | > Now I am one of the silent lurkers.
         | 
         | So that's where you guys went.
         | 
         | I remember how forums used to always have a few extremely
         | knowledgeable individuals that would post and give insights but
         | for the most part would be pretty nice and humble. Sometimes
         | they even worked in the industy. And a lot of times they
         | wouldn't even comment until another user called them out.
         | 
         | Then the psuedo experts started showing up. They either
         | overestimate their experience or just spent some time on
         | wikipedia and think that they're an expert, and they make a
         | point to pick apart every post they can. And even less
         | knowledgeable posters will back the pseudo expert because they
         | are relentless and are able to sound smart.
        
       | sneak wrote:
       | I think a lot of collectors collect specifically for the same
       | reason people grind in RPGs: to get the mental and emotional
       | satisfaction from the "complete set" (of stamps, or rare armor,
       | or whatever).
       | 
       | Collecting without such a goal would, to people like that (who I
       | assume comprise the large majority of collectors) would seem like
       | a colossal waste of time. Why grind out the dungeon to get the
       | greaves and the chest plate and then not spend a few more hours
       | to get the helm?!!
       | 
       | Most human behavior is not very rational, and I say that
       | referring to both parties in this story.
        
         | lb1lf wrote:
         | -The problem, of course, being: What do you do when the
         | collection is complete? (I ran into that problem once - I
         | collected stamps fairly seriously during my childhood and
         | youth, spurred on by my father who was and is really into it.
         | 
         | However, I narrowed my collection to two themes - Norway and
         | scout-themed stamps and letters from all over the world.
         | 
         | Once the Norway collection was complete to the current date, it
         | was a massive 'meh' moment - just obtaining new stamps as they
         | were issued wasn't much of a challenge, so the Norway albums
         | were put on the shelf, and interest in stamp collecting
         | withered quickly.
         | 
         | Oh well. It was great fun while it lasted. :)
        
           | dehrmann wrote:
           | The process of collecting was probably most of the fun,
           | anyway. That said, I could see how the internet ruined it
           | because 99% of what you're looking for can be in your hands
           | in a week for the right price.
        
             | lb1lf wrote:
             | -I've met collectors (of records, in that case) who had
             | what I consider an admirable attitude towards the perils of
             | instant eBay gratification - seeing as the chase in most
             | cases was better than the catch, they'd imposed a 'no
             | Internet' rule - albums were only bought in physical record
             | stores, at record fairs, garage sales &c - but, as it was
             | put - 'Unless I can chat a bit with the seller, then put
             | the money in his hand, there's no deal.'
             | 
             | I'd imagine it makes the hobby equal measures more
             | rewarding and frustrating.
             | 
             | (I've since tried to adopt this approach myself as far as
             | practically possible - seeing as for me (YMMV), the social
             | aspect of discussing music and artists with other
             | enthusiasts is a major part of the appeal, helping me
             | discover new music on ways no auction site can.
        
           | compiler-guy wrote:
           | Not every hobby needs to be a lifelong hobby. The things you
           | learn and the enjoyment you get while it is current can be
           | worth it alone.
        
       | klelatti wrote:
       | Lots of discussion about collecting (and in seeking to own a
       | complete set of stamps, coins etc) vs exploring. I wonder though
       | if for most if the pleasure is in a combination of the two.
       | 
       | When I was very young I collected the stamps of my country -
       | which I guess will be fairly common. Seeking out issues that I
       | was missing was appealing and there was definitely a thrill in
       | tracking down missing items.
       | 
       | At the same time I learned about history (albeit in a superficial
       | way) both from knowing about the era in which the stamps were
       | issued and, for more recent issues, from the topics depicted on
       | the stamps. That knowledge seemed to stick too and more so than
       | just from reading books. I guess I also learned a little about
       | markets and scarcity.
       | 
       | I wonder if that knowledge would have stuck without the effort of
       | seeking and the reward of finding and whether we have lost
       | something in the ease of access to information today.
        
       | lordnacho wrote:
       | What? You're just coding for fun? Where's your helm charts? If
       | you're going to be serious about this, you'll need to learn three
       | languages. HTML isn't a language. Make sure it works across
       | platforms, too. Also, you have make it multicloud.
        
         | gamacodre wrote:
         | What? You only put in one load balancer? What were you
         | _thinking_?
        
         | gscott wrote:
         | but I just want to host my sites on GoDaddy
        
       | dehrmann wrote:
       | > I am just sentimental about my childhood pastime and keepsake,
       | and I want to recapture it as best as I can.
       | 
       | Sigh. I get the desire, but it feels like it just won't be the
       | same.
        
         | michrassena wrote:
         | I've had a similar realization rather recently when cleaning
         | out my parent's house after both their deaths. My father got me
         | into stamp and coin collecting as a young child and it was an
         | opportunity to bond and have something in common. For many
         | years now, I haven't given the hobby much thought. Seeing the
         | remnants on the old stamp collection brought back some
         | memories. As I looked up values and got a better idea of what
         | the collection might be worth, I could see clearly that even
         | sheets of uncanceled stamps, which I used to prize, were near
         | worthless. Some of that difference in perceived value is
         | explained by the perceptions of a child versus that of an
         | adult. But these stamps just hadn't appreciated much in value
         | over many years, certainly not the degree anyone could call
         | them a good investment.
         | 
         | But what was most striking to me, which I hadn't really thought
         | about when I was young collecting these for entertainment, was
         | just how particular and stultifying the grading systems for any
         | collectible can be. I think the system, and how it interacts
         | with money, is the culprit. There is this undercurrent of
         | curation and preservation that goes along with collecting which
         | leads to perfectly preserved toys in boxes. I appreciate things
         | in themselves, and not just for their use. But I dislike the
         | idea that a blemish, like a torn perforation on a sheet of
         | stamps, can devastate the value of an object. For the objects I
         | have several of, their use contributes to my enjoyment. If
         | other people want to maintain museums, that's up to them.
        
           | philjohn wrote:
           | I'd argue that since they brought you and your father closer
           | together, and was something you spent time with him doing,
           | they're priceless - what does it matter if they weren't a
           | good investment monetarily, time, and especially time with
           | people who you won't have in your life for the entire
           | duration, is worth more, because no amount of money can buy
           | more of it.
        
             | michrassena wrote:
             | I agree, there's no question that was the real value. I
             | should point out that whatever made it fun is gone.
             | Whatever I found compelling about design or history as
             | exemplified in stamps, is available through the Internet
             | and books. If I were to collect stamps again, it would be
             | images of stamps, not the fragile artifacts themselves.
        
       | temp0826 wrote:
       | Reminded of the scene in the movie Unbreakable when Samuel L
       | Jackson's character refuses to sell the rare drawing to the man
       | after he reveals it was going to be a gift for a young child, who
       | would be unable to fully appreciate it.
        
       | jonnycomputer wrote:
       | This story reminded me of something I lost about the same age. My
       | grandfather was a surveyor and he gave me his compass. It was not
       | an expensive one, though it was made of bronze. I took it with me
       | to Los Angeles. I don't think it ever came back. But I don't know
       | _where_ I lost track of it. I wish I still had it to remember him
       | by.
        
       | celesti wrote:
       | Maybe because stamp collecting was the first shopclerks
       | "business" he did not really see the joy in it any longer?
       | Logical arrangements are nice but aesthetic arrangements are also
       | nice!
        
       | Vaslo wrote:
       | Funny to see this - had a similar situation recently (sort of)
       | with a train shop. I couldn't care less about collecting trains -
       | I bought a train a few years ago for xmas and my kids loved it so
       | I bought a year round one as well. Lionel trains are not cheap
       | and easy to repair. Both have already broke where a significant
       | repair was needed.
       | 
       | I watched videos and tried to fix one that wouldn't fire up at
       | all. Took it to the shop and the proprieties seemed kind of
       | annoying with me as I asked for their help to repair (of course
       | intending to pay). They gave me a lecture about letting a four
       | year old play with a train like this. Usually I'd lose my temper
       | and start arguing but my son really missed the train.
       | 
       | They ended up replacing the engine board ($120 bucks) and took
       | forever to get it back to me.
       | 
       | I get that people have sacrosanct hobbies like coding, sports,
       | etc. They have to understand that dilettantes like me may want to
       | dabble!
       | 
       | Also I am a self taught DBA and never ever use keys. I'll take in
       | any incoming fire as probably deserved :).
        
         | m463 wrote:
         | I went to a train store a few years back, and yes there was
         | definitely a "trains are serious business" vibe about the
         | place.
         | 
         | Maybe it's because most of the customers have white hair and
         | extra money.
         | 
         | Thing is, it's hilarious how seriously trains are done!
         | 
         | You buy a DCC locomotive and it has lights that light up in the
         | direction of travel. The engine spools up with a delay like a
         | real locomotive with sound increasing, the air brakes releasing
         | and only then does it move. And they have 20 horns to choose
         | from - pick the right one for the regional line you're
         | simulating. Sort of nuts.
         | 
         | I was talking to another customer though and he balanced it all
         | out. He said he had too many trains. He told me it was really
         | relaxing to go downstairs after dinner with a glass of wine and
         | run his trains or work on his layout.
         | 
         | I think the best train guy was Gomez Addams.
        
           | ineptech wrote:
           | Growing up, I knew a guy, friend of my Dad's, who had an
           | incredibly elaborate train set in his basement. It's clear he
           | had thousands of hours invested in it. I never got in to
           | trains, but I do have a hobby video game coding project, and
           | I'm struck by how similar it is to a model train hobby:
           | 
           | * I work on it exclusively in the evenings after the kids are
           | asleep
           | 
           | * It relaxes me and gives me something to daydream about
           | during work meetings
           | 
           | * It'll never make me any money and it'll never be done
           | 
           | The funny thing about my Dad's friend was, he hated showing
           | off his trains. Very few people knew it existed, and even
           | fewer had seen it; he only let me see it once, and my dad was
           | his best friend for 40+ years.
           | 
           | Back then I thought he was secretive, or afraid I'd break
           | something. Now that I have my own pointless hobby, I think I
           | understand him better. It's embarrassing to put so much time
           | and thought into something and to have someone see it and
           | say, "Neat! So, anyway..." I guess it's more valuable as a
           | private solace than as a conversation piece.
        
             | m463 wrote:
             | I think it's nice, maybe even necessary, to have something
             | that you enjoy, and maybe you're even good at, but you
             | don't have to care about and doesn't have to become a
             | responsibility.
             | 
             | I had little hobby projects, and people were like - you
             | should make this into a product. And I had to fight this
             | sort of "am I too lazy to do it? am I afraid?" but really,
             | I just needed something that didn't have a point.
             | 
             | I also think there are a lot of things I didn't "get" as a
             | kid. I remember trying golf as a kid, and I thought "this
             | is so totally boring, why don't these guys ride bikes
             | instead?" And it's only when you get (much) older do you
             | realize people have so much responsibility that getting
             | outside and walking around is a treasure. (of course it
             | could be other things)
        
         | ansible wrote:
         | I was nodding along with you (though I'm not into trains
         | anymore) until this:
         | 
         | > _Also I am a self taught DBA and never ever use keys. I'll
         | take in any incoming fire as probably deserved :)._
         | 
         | ... that 's like saying "I'm a self-taught programmer, but I
         | never use functions."
         | 
         | I mean, yeah, you can still get some things done that way, but
         | if you spent a little time learning what's possible, you might
         | be a lot happier with the end product.
        
           | grawprog wrote:
           | >that's like saying "I'm a self-taught programmer, but I
           | never use functions."
           | 
           | Once you've mastered if/else and goto, what else do ya need?
        
             | ansible wrote:
             | Well, technically... you are correct.
             | 
             | It would still be an improvement over the older BASIC
             | dialects, because with those it was common to have a limit
             | to the number of variables due to names being one or two
             | letters.
        
               | gamacodre wrote:
               | Yep. ZX81 BASIC had 26 string variables (A$ through Z$)
               | and 26 floating point variables (A through Z). No integer
               | variables per se, but you could POKE and PEEK to get at
               | 8-bit values anywhere in memory - which typically maxed
               | out at 16K.
        
             | zeta0134 wrote:
             | Here come the traumatic memories of doing If/Then/Goto on
             | TI-Basic, not understanding the Else or End tokens at all.
             | Turns out each If/Then opens a new stack frame, and because
             | I was never closing them with the corresponding tokens,
             | memory slowly filled while the program ran. You could
             | therefore get a high score of exactly 203 on my PONG clone
             | before it crashed.
             | 
             | Good times! But seriously, take a few minutes to learn your
             | tools properly if you use them more than once, it'll make
             | things so much easier. :)
        
           | samatman wrote:
           | In other words, a whole subculture.
           | 
           | This used to be very common with VBA, I would expect these
           | days it's more of a Python thing.
           | 
           | Someone wants to do something, they find out that the thing
           | they want to do is "programming", and they start writing a
           | script that can do that thing. They add to it, it gets
           | longer, it works.
           | 
           | They probably know functions _exist_ but don 't really get
           | why they would use one. There's a decent chance they'll never
           | get it, and that's fine.
           | 
           | I have roughly ten python scripts I use for this and that,
           | and three of them don't have any functions. I wrote a similar
           | no-function python script for a work thing a couple jobs
           | back, and my CTO was kind of ticked off, said I should know
           | better, and don't submit it for code review again without a
           | main() function and some "proper separation of concerns".
           | 
           | Which, fine; it's his company, the rewrite is trivial, I
           | probably cleaned some things up a bit. But the script was
           | fine the way it was.
        
           | m463 wrote:
           | OTOH, I can see not using subroutines with side effects...
        
         | bombcar wrote:
         | LEGO makes (made) trains that are roughly Lionel size and
         | they're much more durable (and though some of the parts are
         | older and expensive, they're available).
        
       | zabzonk wrote:
       | Yeah, you should collect what interests you. My Dad, who was an
       | RAF V-bomber captain, had a great (and quite valuable) collection
       | based on early airmail, with pictures of airships and biplanes on
       | the stamps.
        
       | kingsuper20 wrote:
       | The fight for status among males will never end.
       | 
       | It took me decades to chat in bars about things I have a _lot_ of
       | detailed knowledge about. Learning to listen to stories and not
       | automatically correct took some time.
       | 
       | Nobody loves a pedant.
        
         | vmception wrote:
         | > Nobody loves a pedant.
         | 
         | I've taken it a step further and play along with spiritual and
         | astrology talk from women.
         | 
         | About 2/3rds of guys and 1/3rd of other women act very confused
         | that I'm not immediately denigrating the person talking about
         | signs and dietary restrictions. Turns out all you have to do is
         | not do that, and a lot of things open up with very visually
         | attractive people. Yeah, I'll talk about higher vibrations with
         | the fun lean vegan woman.
         | 
         | They're used to people pedantically challenging their belief
         | system, but many can amplify their interest in you if you
         | simply don't do that.
        
           | lupire wrote:
           | How about just being a decent human being instead a creepy
           | pickup artist?
        
             | mcphage wrote:
             | Are the only 2 kinds of people "creepy pickup artist" and
             | "asshole"?
        
             | vmception wrote:
             | I don't mind that belief system, and I'm actually
             | advocating for people to not denigrate or lecture people
             | that talk about astrology. The bar shouldn't be so low. I'm
             | pretty sure this is being a decent human being, you're
             | assuming a lot for a reason beyond me. I would still use
             | the term play along because it is accurate.
        
         | wisty wrote:
         | Is it really just a "fight for status among males"?
         | 
         | If you don't correct someone, I only see two possibilities:
         | 
         | 1. The topic is so worthless (to you) it doesn't matter if
         | they're wrong.
         | 
         | 2. They are so worthless (to you) it's not worth correcting
         | them on an important topic.
         | 
         | 2b. They lack the intelligence (IQ or EQ) to grow from being
         | corrected.
         | 
         | Of course, a some of the time this is right.
         | 
         | Yes there's also a chance that you're wrong (in which case
         | correcting them may result in you being corrected, or at least
         | a potentially fruitful discussion), but the same would apply -
         | is the topic and person worthwhile the chance of upsetting a
         | thin-skinned idiot?
        
         | Guthur wrote:
         | Maybe because generally men have a lot of trouble identifying
         | their self worth in society, maybe because few people are
         | actually that sympathetic to men and their struggle to find
         | meaningful fulfillment within their lives.
         | 
         | Every struggle is seen as a negative, some "toxic" side of
         | masculinity that needs to be eradicated rather than embraced
         | and understood. We are positively hostile to it.
         | 
         | And somewhat strangely we also attack femininity, though in a
         | less openly hostile manner, more killed with compassion. We
         | seem to feel sorry for outward femininity which appears to be
         | having the effect of pushing women towards a more masculine
         | outlook. I feel we no longer adore femininity like we once did.
         | 
         | Some may argue that this is all for the best, and that we need
         | to push us all to some more less defined state, but I'm not so
         | sure that the cost in diversity is worth it.
        
           | kingsuper20 wrote:
           | This brings to mind Ted Kaczynski's manifesto in terms of the
           | need for achievable, non-trivial goals and the inability of
           | so-called 'surrogate' goals to really satisfy that need.
        
             | pmiller2 wrote:
             | I love when people reference Kaczynski's work in serious
             | discussions like this. Ted Kaczynski the domestic terrorist
             | and murderer was not a person to be admired, but Ted
             | Kaczynski the anarcho-primitivist philosopher is one of the
             | most underrated and important intellectuals of the late
             | 20th century. There's an awful lot packed into his
             | manifesto, and I wish more people could see past his crimes
             | in order to take that in.
             | 
             | BTW, I found out he's updated the manifesto, and that it,
             | along with some other of his works, was published in an
             | anthology in 2010:
             | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ted_Kaczynski#Other_works
        
           | msrenee wrote:
           | I've definitely had my femininity attacked in an openly
           | hostile manner. Often. When I was in junior high and high
           | school, I thought women were the lesser sex and eschewed
           | girly hobbies and clothing in favor of more masculine things.
           | No dresses, no makeup, I cooked in order to eat, nothing
           | fancy. I hung out with the guys and played video games. It
           | wasn't until the last 5 years or so that I realized I could
           | wear skirts out shopping and work a blue collar job during
           | the week. I know masculinity is under attack in many circles,
           | but it's quite the claim to say that femininity is less so.
        
       | ISL wrote:
       | Collections can be both free* and compelling: https://www-cs-
       | faculty.stanford.edu/~knuth/diamondsigns/diam...
       | 
       | * at least in capital cost. I imagine he expended plenty of time
       | and travel on the subject.
        
       | irrational wrote:
       | I wonder what those 2 guys in the store were doing all day? Just
       | buying and selling rare stamps? Maybe hoping to find that one
       | stamp to complete some collection?
        
       | nlh wrote:
       | I collected coins avidly when I was ~10-13 and the hobby just re-
       | ignited itself with me again, now 30 years later (I can't exactly
       | explain how or why, but here we are).
       | 
       | I went to a coin show today on a whim and what I discovered was
       | that there are ALL types of collectors, and everyone should
       | really understand that:
       | 
       | * There's 10 year old me that was obsessed with finding the rare
       | die varieties hidden in the $1 bins,
       | 
       | * There's 42 year old me that is now getting deep joy buying the
       | rare gems (1790s silver dollars, $20 gold pieces, etc.) that were
       | beyond out-of-reach of 10-year-old me
       | 
       | * There's folks who obsess over filling every date of a specific
       | series
       | 
       | Etc. etc. etc.
       | 
       | Find your joy and run with it, and _definitely_ don 't try to
       | tell someone that their joy is the wrong one.
        
       | WalterBright wrote:
       | > It takes me several years to actually accept that the stamp
       | album is gone, not hiding in a box somewhere or shelved away in
       | some dusty corner of my mum's garage.
       | 
       | I lost my comic book collection. I was sure it was stolen. I
       | looked everywhere for it.
       | 
       | About 20 years later it reappeared in the back of the closet. I
       | have no explanation.
        
         | StavrosK wrote:
         | Isn't it obvious? The thief returned them after they finished
         | reading them.
        
       | 8bitsrule wrote:
       | Stamps are one of the most portable collectibles. (Along with
       | bugs.) Moves forced the loss of other collections ... but I've
       | kept the collection of "only about 6000 or 7000 stamps" I made as
       | a kid (I counted once).
       | 
       | It went with me to stay at grandma's, on babysitting jobs, on
       | summer trips that went to nowhere to do nothing. Open the book,
       | get out the hinges, dive in.
       | 
       | I learned a lot about world geography, culture, arts and crafts,
       | and political BS from those revealing little bits of 'official'
       | history. The 'most valuable' stamp I found (nothing printed on
       | it) taught me -nothing-.
        
       | justin_oaks wrote:
       | > So, for you, it was just a form of mindless entertainment? A
       | hobby?
       | 
       | Wow, such condescension. Reminds me of the saying "Everyone
       | thinks other people's hobbies are a waste of time". For some it's
       | stamp collecting, others it's watching musicals, and others do
       | programming. Everyone should be allowed to do what they love in
       | their spare time without others looking down on them.
        
         | criddell wrote:
         | I'm a fan of John Lennon's take. He supposedly said "Time you
         | enjoy wasting, was not wasted."
        
         | dehrmann wrote:
         | I almost appreciated how condescending he was. As someone who
         | tries to avoid collecting, it just reinforced that decision.
         | 
         | I used to collect Star Trek Christmas tree ornaments. At some
         | point, I realized I'd just get a new one, put it in the box
         | with the others, and not touch it until I open the box in a
         | year. The end game of collecting seemed very futile.
         | 
         | This gave me a better appreciation for things that are
         | performed (like playing an instrument) because they're never
         | perfect, never finished, and there might not even be an
         | artifact of it.
        
           | Baeocystin wrote:
           | My parents were huge collectors of ...stuff. Not quite
           | hoarding, but in the same neighborhood.
           | 
           | I was for a while, too, simply because of how I was raised.
           | But as my own home filled, I clearly noticed how less happy I
           | was becoming. And when my parents passed, the work of dealing
           | with a full home was, frankly put, awful.
           | 
           | I purposefully have changed my hobbies to things like music,
           | cooking, gardening. Gaming, too. You can practice a musical
           | piece a thousand times- it doesn't add to your mess. Cooking
           | fulfills an immediate need, and it's been my experience that
           | quality food as a gift is more appreciated than almost any
           | physical artifact. And plants bring their own joy, without
           | continuously taking more space.
           | 
           | My mother once told me late in her life to spend my money on
           | experiences, not things, and I think about it often. She was
           | right.
        
         | Turing_Machine wrote:
         | That attitude reminded me of a guy who owned a used book store
         | in a town where I used to live.
         | 
         | He had all the "literary" stuff on prominent display, and all
         | the genre fiction crammed into the back.
         | 
         | Oh, he'd _sell_ you science fiction, or mysteries, or romance,
         | or whatever, but he 'd always make sure to give you a little
         | sneer when ringing you up. "Enjoy your trash, lowbrow!"
         | 
         | His store went out of business and he had to liquidate his
         | entire stock at 90% off.
        
           | Baeocystin wrote:
           | We have an awesome local used bookstore that has managed to
           | survive the covid shutdowns.
           | 
           | Their secret? They have their 'trashy lowbrow' proudly front
           | and center. They, of course, carry everything, but they also
           | know what sells, and want people happily reading, no other
           | requirements.
           | 
           | Turns out that sort of approach leads to lifelong, regular
           | customers!
        
           | lupire wrote:
           | Mitchell and Webb, "The Insulting Librarian"
           | 
           | https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=rqTE-ig7NhY
        
         | true_religion wrote:
         | Many people who go to stamp dealers are collecting because of a
         | personal interest in history. It's a hobby, but it's a serious
         | hobby for them with non-entertainment goals. It's those people
         | who start stamp stores, visit them, and generally keep the
         | entire industry alive.
         | 
         | Finding someone who simply does it for 'joy' is against the
         | grain.
         | 
         | It's like having a Porsche and not knowing anything about its
         | internals or engineering history and simply driving it for fun
         | on the track. If you join a car club, they'll think you are
         | weird for not caring or knowing the displacement of your engine
         | or your tire size.
        
           | bartread wrote:
           | > It's like having a Porsche and not knowing anything about
           | its internals or engineering history and simply driving it
           | for fun on the track. If you join a car club, they'll think
           | you are weird for not caring or knowing the displacement of
           | your engine or your tire size.
           | 
           | Who cares if they do? If you want to buy a Porsche to enjoy
           | hooning it around the track without knowing about any of that
           | stuff, and if you can afford it? Why not do it? Who cares
           | what those people think?
           | 
           | I absolutely don't mind if people want to geek out on the
           | details or really take their hobbies seriously: that's
           | totally cool. I do start to mind a bit when they expect me to
           | do the same when that might not be what I want to do.
        
             | true_religion wrote:
             | > I do start to mind a bit when they expect me to do the
             | same when that might not be what I want to do.
             | 
             | I definitely agree that it's annoying.
        
           | foodstances wrote:
           | I've been involved in many car clubs and have never seen
           | anyone think someone is "weird" for not knowing those things,
           | they just assume the person isn't that interested in caring
           | about those technical details (akin to being at a tech
           | conference and there being programmers vs. users of a
           | platform). As long as you have an interest in the cars and
           | are sociable, other people are generally happy that you're
           | there.
        
         | lb1lf wrote:
         | -Myself, I don't listen to country&western music, but I don't
         | want to denigrate people who do.
         | 
         | Oh, if you listen to C&W and read this - 'denigrate' means 'put
         | down'.
         | 
         | :)
         | 
         | (I agree wholeheartedly, though - to each his own, and if I
         | find joy in collecting whatever stamps come my way, then so be
         | it - chances are I have as much fun collecting as someone who,
         | say, only collects NK100 (Norwegian 10 ore posthorn stamp) - it
         | was printed over several decades, more than half a billion of
         | them in a country of (then) a couple of million inhabitants -
         | lots of minor variations in paper, ink, engravings...)
        
       | bobsled wrote:
       | I know what I am meant to think and feel in response to this
       | article, but I don't. Keeping in mind that this was written by
       | the one of the three people in the story, who took it upon
       | themselves to post about the experience online later, I can only
       | assume there is some level of bias and quite possibly
       | exaggeration. Put simply, these are the facts of the interaction:
       | 1. An inexperienced individual enters a highly specialized area.
       | 2. Someone who we can assume is highly experienced takes time out
       | of their day to explain to them their (probably popular)
       | conception of how the specialized area functions. 3. This
       | experienced individual gives them something of value relating to
       | the highly specialized area (I do not know what the cash value of
       | this thing is, but it is nonzero), likely in hopes of future
       | business. 4. The inexperienced individual is upset and posts
       | about the interaction online, tagging it with "jerk".
       | 
       | I understand the point of the article, but the characterization
       | of the shopkeeper seems unfair. If you're unwilling to learn from
       | someone because they don't understand what exactly you're trying
       | to do, or because they speak condescendingly, or because they
       | smell bad, or because you disagree with their opinion on X, Y, or
       | Z, you will not learn very much.
        
         | bittercynic wrote:
         | I thought this was written in an open enough way to leave room
         | for a wide range of takeaways, and it also seems fair to say
         | the shop keeper was acting like a jerk. Not that he's obliged
         | to serve a client who's looking for something so different from
         | what the shop provides, but he could have been more pleasant,
         | and just let the customer know he doesn't have what he's
         | looking for.
         | 
         | I think there is a place in the world for people with
         | specialized interests to have a shop that caters exclusively to
         | other people who are deep into the hobby, and to be a little
         | brusk to normies who wander in looking for something else. It
         | sure would have been a lot nicer if the shop keeper just
         | understood the situation and kindly explained "That's not what
         | we do here", but, hey, not everybody's gonna be super nice.
         | It's part of life.
        
         | II2II wrote:
         | Perhaps it is honest rather than embellished. I have had
         | similar experiences with bike shops. Some seem to be more
         | interested in converting or repulsing customers who don't fit
         | their definition of serious.
         | 
         | That being said, the author did walk into the shop with a
         | rather difficult request. How do you recreate something
         | personal?
        
       | MattGaiser wrote:
       | Just to add some context for why the dealer probably acted that
       | way.
       | 
       | Stamp collectors for exploration are quite a bit different from
       | the kinds of collectors that tend to go to stamp dealers (I am
       | one of those collectors).
       | 
       | You end up focussing on extremely narrow areas of the hobby to
       | the point where you are hunting down which library has a painting
       | a stamp is copied from or trying to track down an envelope sent
       | by a particular person from a particular city.
       | 
       | You can have 10 different variations of a stamp that look all the
       | same except under a magnifying glass.
       | 
       | There are collectors who have hundreds of thousands of dollars in
       | their collections and all of the same single stamp. Just 1000
       | different copies of it.
       | 
       | The premier component of my collection is an exhibit on the 1982
       | Canadian Philatelic Youth Issue, a single stamp series (about
       | stamps).
       | 
       | So for a lot of collectors (including the ones willing to spend
       | thousands a year) it's less an accumulation hobby and more a
       | specific research project.
       | 
       | Not excusing the behaviour of the dealers, but meeting someone
       | who collected so widely could be unusual for them.
        
         | mcguire wrote:
         | The problem is that some of those collectors don't realize that
         | there are any other ways of approaching a hobby.
         | 
         | A while back on BGG, someone new dropped a question in a forum
         | about designing a game based on a web comic. He was told
         | immediately that he'd never make money, that he'd never be
         | successful without more experience than he'd be willing to get,
         | and to top it off, got a long lecture from one grognard about
         | how the game---based on a comic---would be a total failure
         | unless he dropped the concept and rebased it on said grognard's
         | own ideas.
         | 
         | The newbie concluded, rightly, that it wasn't a welcoming
         | community.
        
         | yannis wrote:
         | I have collected stamps as a kid and I have been collecting
         | Postal History for decades on and off, focusing mainly on
         | research and writing up the covers that I have managed to
         | collect. Kept me sane during the COVID-19 lockdowns.
         | 
         | Philately is not about 'chasing madly a missing stamp', but a
         | journey for those interested in history, especially local
         | history. It is still a great hobby and to anyone interested to
         | start, start from buying a small collection. Most collectors
         | will either buy from a dealer, but most often from an auction.
         | See https://stampauctionnetwork.com/ as an example. You can
         | build a collection with very little money or spent hundreds of
         | thousands.
         | 
         | It inspires me to hold an old letter (cover or wrapper in
         | philatelic jargon), that has travelled through a ship across
         | continents and has survived for 200 years and now is in my
         | collection. Pre-stamp letters go for very little, especially
         | North American, British and really for a song for most European
         | countries.
         | 
         | The bitcoin of the early eighties was 'getting into hard
         | assets'. Lots of funds invested into stamps and drove prices to
         | levels that collectors couldn't buy. They burnt their fingers,
         | while collectors waited. It is still a huge market possibly 3-5
         | billion USD a year. As an investment I would not recommend
         | them, but as a nice indoor hobby and to socialize outside your
         | own circle is worth it.
        
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