(C) Daily Kos This story was originally published by Daily Kos and is unaltered. . . . . . . . . . . Cheers and Jeers: Rum and Coke FRIDAY! [1] ['Backgroundurl Avatar_Large', 'Nickname', 'Joined', 'Created_At', 'Story Count', 'N_Stories', 'Comment Count', 'N_Comments', 'Popular Tags', 'Showtags Popular_Tags'] Date: 2023-01-13 You are now below the fold. You fool. You poor, poor fool. "On Monday we learned that lawyers for Joe Biden happened upon a handful of classified documents that were found in a private office he used at the University of Pennsylvania. Of course, anytime top-secret documents are mishandled it needs to be taken seriously. That's something Republicans and Democrats believe, although Republicans have only believed it since Monday." —Jimmy Kimmel New York Republicans called on Congressman George Santos to resign. Santos says he's not a quitter, and he proved it at the '92 Olympics by winning five gold medals." —Jimmy Fallon x Fascinating family tree! 🌳 #Colbert pic.twitter.com/LdK5viEBE6 — The Late Show (@colbertlateshow) January 13, 2023 - "Russian president Vladimir Putin has announced that he has demoted the top military commander in Ukraine and brought in a replacement. But you know what they say: When God closes a door, Putin opens a fourth-story window." —Seth Meyers "The world's first robot lawyer will soon defend a client against a speeding ticket in its first-ever court case. The artificial intelligence software will run on a smartphone, listen to the proceedings, and then instruct the defendant on what to say via an earpiece. Which is a long way of saying the defendant s going to jail." —James Cordon And two years ago this week: "Trump got impeached in December 2019 and January 2021, and botched COVID in between. Dude basically made a pandemic sandwich with impeachment bread." —Jimmy Fallon And now, our feature presentation… - Cheers and Jeers for Friday, January 13, 2023 Note: How do you know when Friday the 13th has brought you bad luck? When you find yourself reading Cheers and Jeers on a Friday night. Here endeth the lesson. - By the Numbers: 8 days!!! Days 'til Penguin Awareness Day: 7 Days 'til Winterfest in Amana, Iowa: 8 President Biden's approval rating among registered voters in the latest YouGov/Economist poll: 50% Amount that'll be invested in Georgia's economy, thanks in part to the Inflation Reduction Act, when Hanwha Q Cell builds the largest solar panel company in the U.S.: $2.5 billion Number of jobs that'll be created, many of which will not require a college degree: 2,500 Amount of $$$ generated Tuesday during the first seven hours of Connecticut's first day of legal marijuana sales: $250,000 Number of actors besides Sylvester Stallone to have starred in a #1 box-office movie in six consecutive decades: 0 - Puppy Pic of the Day: Weekend plans… - CHEERS to taming the beast. Inflation is un-inflating, according to the latest report from the Federal Bureau of People Who Keep Track of These Things. Let's take a spin around the headlines we found on The World Wide Web and see how our media overlords are framing it: Inflation Slowed Further in December for the Sixth Month in a Row (Washington Post) Inflation cooled in December, bolstering hopes US can avert recession (ABC News) U.S. inflation Cools Again, Putting Fed on Track to Downshift (Bloomberg) Dow Climbs Over 200 Points After CPI Date Shows Cooling Inflation (CNBC) In other news, this cursor is drunk again. U.S. Inflation Rate Fell Last Month Amid Cheaper Fuel and Airfares (New York Times) Biden Stuffs Classified Documents Down Pants as Democrats Continue Eating Babies and Illegals Pour Into Country To Rape and Pillage YOUR FAMILY (Fox News) Prices fell in December as inflation continued to moderate (CNN) Biden Hails Report Showing Easing Inflation Numbers (USA Today) As Inflation Eases, US Economy Looks Less Bleak (CBS News) Nanobots Believed Responsible for Fake Inflation Numbers—Eggs now $1,000 Each (Breitbart) Inflation cooled in December to 6.5%, but the Fed is likely to keep interest rates high (NBC News) Okay, who blabbed about the nanobots? JEERS to placenta behind the wheel. Oh, hey, Virginia, here's another outstanding use of your tax dollars—paying the salaries of the MAGA nimrods behind this: A Virginia bill would deem a pregnant person's fetus a passenger in a car, thereby allowing the vehicle to use the car pool lane on highways. “Honk HONK!!! Outta the way, you effing idiot!” —Hot-headed Blastocyst Carpooler HB 1894, which a Republican legislator pre-filed in the General Assembly on Tuesday, "provides that a pregnant woman shall be considered two people for the purposes of determining occupancy" in high occupancy vehicle and high occupancy toll lanes on expressways in the state. But they stopped short of allowing HOV lane access for vehicles with a "God is My Co-Pilot" sticker on their bumper. Because, c'mon, that would just be silly. CHEERS to stopping with all the shooting and the banging and the bayoneting and whatnot. 239 years ago tomorrow, on January 14, 1784, Congress ratified the Treaty of Paris, officially ending our War of Independence: After the British defeat at Yorktown, peace talks in Paris began in April 1782 between Richard Oswarld representing Great Britain and the American Peace Commissioners Benjamin Franklin, John Jay, and John Adams. Can you IMAGINE what this would fetch on eBay today? The American negotiators were joined by Henry Laurens two days before the preliminary articles of peace were signed on November 30, 1782. The Treaty of Paris, formally ending the war, was not signed until September 3, 1783. The Continental Congress, which was temporarily situated in Annapolis, Maryland, at the time, ratified the Treaty of Paris on January 14, 1784. Among the other provisions we secured from Britain: recognition of our borders, repairs to all the airports they damaged, and royalty-free Benny Hill reruns. - BRIEF SANITY BREAK - x What a great dad 🥰 pic.twitter.com/TUTROFXV53 — made me smile (@mademe__smile) January 3, 2023 - END BRIEF SANITY BREAK - CHEERS to one of the good guys. On this date 45 years ago, Minnesota Senator Hubert Humphrey of Minnesota—aka Mayor of Minneapolis, LBJ's vice president, 1968 presidential candidate (great platform except for supporting the Vietnam War) and fierce advocate in the war on poverty—died much too young at 66. He was wise: "Compassion is not weakness, and concern for the unfortunate is not socialism." Humphrey in his prime. "Behind every successful man is a proud wife and a surprised mother-in-law." “We seek an America able to preserve and nurture all the basic rights of free expression, yet able to reach across the divisions that too often separate race from race, region from region, young from old, worker from scholar, rich from poor. We seek an America able to do this in the higher knowledge that our goals and ideals are worthy of conciliation and personal sacrifice.” "Liberalism, above all, means emancipation—emancipation from one's fears, his inadequacies, from prejudice, from discrimination, from poverty." And a special shout-out from Humphrey to the MAGA cult: "The right to be heard does not automatically include the right to be taken seriously." Amen. CHEERS to home vegetation. Here's some of the haps on the squawk box this weekend, starting with Chris Hayes and the MSNBC crew processing the Friday news dumps. Or you can catch a new edition of Penn & Teller: Fool Us at 8 on the CW, followed by an hour of Whose Line Is It Anyway? This movie is bonkers. And I know bonkers. The new movies and home videos are all reviewed here at Rotten Tomatoes. (Remember: you must see Avatar 2 at least five times or James Cameron will come to your house and shout his Titanic acceptance speech at you.) The NBA schedule is here, the NFL wild card schedule is here, the NHL schedule is here. Amy Schumer hosts an encore edition SNL. Sunday on 60 Minutes: A peek inside the fusion-making wizards at the Lawrence Livermore Lab’s National Ignition Facility, and a report on the investigators of Russia’s smarmy oligarchs. The Critics Choice Awards air on The CW Sunday at 7. And when that’s over it’s off to bed because you have a busy week ahead. Now here's your Sunday morning lineup: Meet the Press: TBA Big media weekend for Viceroy TBA. This Week: TBA Face the Nation: TBA CNN's State of the Union: rep. Jamie Raskin (D-MD); Rep. Ro Khanna (D-CA); Rep. James Comer (The Cult-KY). Fox GOP Talking Points Sunday: Rep. Tony Gonzales (The Cult-TX); Governor Sarah H’yuckabee Sanders (The Cult-AR). Happy viewing! - Ten years ago in C&J: January 13, 2013 JEERS to the return of the dolts. The 113th "Do Nothingest" Congress convenes today. On the one hand, they'll ignore jobs, climate change, immigration, infrastructure improvements, gun violence and civil rights. On the other hand, they'll hack away at women's rights, voter rights, Obamacare and Sandy disaster relief. On the other other hand, they'll name some post offices, hold the debt ceiling hostage, and take a record amount of time off while getting paid $174,000 with full benefits. I say this in the finest George W. Bush tradition: heckuva job. - And just one more… CHEERS to proving the dummy wrong. Thirteen years ago this week I got an URGENT email from some conservative hack who wanted me to know something very important. It's—as most of these conspiratorial screeds are—very long, but here's the Crazy Cliffs Notes version. Being a fan of alliteration, the first sentence gave me goosebumps: The discredited, democrat funded 'DailyKos' web site continues with it's daily doctored, dishonest, democrat funded pro-Obama polling numbers. Today's doctored poll shows Obama's approval numbers a full EIGHT points higher than the average of all the respected, neutral, trusted polls and a full TEN points higher than the respected CBS News poll released earlier today. Nobody crosses our Keyboard Kingpin. No one. Let's be clear, Kos is taking money from democrats to doctor opinion polls and the boot-lickers and sycophants that support Kos are afraid to challenge Kos. Remember, dissenting opinion, debate and argument are not allowed on the Kos web site. If you disagree with Kos you are not allowed to post articles on the democrat funded Kos web site so none of the information regarding doctored Kos polls and other Kos lies will ever appear on his web site. Much like the low rated Olbermann program, dissent on the 'DailyKos' is forbidden! The evidence and history of the phony doctored polls on the democrat funded DailyKos irrefutable and striking, unfortunately the anonymous so-called writers that post stories on Kos are not allowed to criticize him or they'll be banned for life. And this is where yours truly takes the "democrat funded" risk of a lifetime—as I do every year at this time—by stepping off the ledge and testing the emailer's grand theory. As a Daily Kos "bootlicker" this is difficult, but here goes: Markos, you are a butthead. The rest is in God's hands. Please pray for my soul. Have a great weekend. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today? - [END] --- [1] Url: https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2023/1/13/2146772/-Cheers-and-Jeers-Rum-and-Coke-FRIDAY Published and (C) by Daily Kos Content appears here under this condition or license: Site content may be used for any purpose without permission unless otherwise specified. via Magical.Fish Gopher News Feeds: gopher://magical.fish/1/feeds/news/dailykos/