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Florida discusses replacing national SAT with test based on "christian tradition" [1]

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Date: 2023-02-18  

Actual Florida test exam with answers pre-filled for students.

In a continuing attempt to punish the College Board for offering African-American AP History while simultaneously hiding the catastrophic continuing failure of public education in the State of Florida, the DeSantis administration is mulling replacing the standardized national SAT with a “great classical and Christian tradition.”

www.miamiherald.com/...

Although discussions are early, potential core sections include:

History: Drawing lines that correctly connect the names of confederate-era generals with pictures of their statues as displayed throughout Florida.

Math: Correctly counting change for customers at theme parks and fast-food restaurants.

In a potential breakthrough, the DeSantis administration has agreed to cover topics of human sexuality:

Basic biology, including the scientific evidence linking masturbation with blindness.

Advanced biology, including the integral role of storks for baby delivery.

Students may optionally write a two-page essay discussing the underappreciated positives of the Ku Klux Klan, such as their superb horsemanship.

Finally, in a breakthrough for students and educators alike, the exam will be distributed with answers pre-filled—students merely need to write their name at the top. The DeSantis administration sees this measure as helping provide Florida’s graduating seniors with a competitive advantage in the national workforce.

In anticipation of complaints from the radical left, the DeSantis administration took pains to assure the public that atheists, Jews, Muslims, and all others will also be allowed to study and sit for the state-wide exam on Christian tradition.

Said the administration’s spokesman, “We don’t discriminate. Each and every student in Florida will study Christian tradition regardless of whether they are saved or going to Hell.”

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[1] Url: https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2023/2/18/2153773/-Florida-discusses-replacing-national-SAT-with-test-based-on-christian-tradition

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