(C) Daily Kos This story was originally published by Daily Kos and is unaltered. . . . . . . . . . . Cheers and Jeers: Thursday [1] ['Backgroundurl Avatar_Large', 'Nickname', 'Joined', 'Created_At', 'Story Count', 'N_Stories', 'Comment Count', 'N_Comments', 'Popular Tags', 'Showtags Popular_Tags'] Date: 2023-04-13 “The big trouble with dumb bastards is that they are too dumb to believe there is such a thing as being smart.” “Being a Humanist means trying to behave decently without expectation of rewards or punishment after you are dead.” Kurt made the world safe for bed heads everywhere. “The good earth—we could have saved it, but we were too damn cheap and lazy.” “It’s perfectly ordinary to be a socialist. It’s perfectly normal to be in favor of fire departments.” “Librarians, not famous for their physical strength or their powerful political connections or their great wealth, all over this country, have staunchly resisted anti-democratic bullies who have tried to remove certain books from their shelves and have refused to reveal to thought police the names of persons who have checked out the titles.” “Those who believe in telekinetics, raise my hand.” "As for preparing this country against an attack from anti-missile anti-missile anti-missiles by developing an anti-missile anti-missile anti-missile anti-missile, I may be in the minority, but I think the American people should spend the money on hospitals and housing and schools and Ferris wheels instead." And my favorite, which remains my personal motto for the 58th consecutive year: I tell you, we are here on Earth to fart around, and don't let anybody tell you different. And now, our feature presentation... - Cheers and Jeers for Thursday, April 13, 2023 Note: Actually, this is Hitler’s note. I keep it on display for historical purposes. - 8 days!!! By the Numbers: Days 'til the Kentucky Derby: 23 Days 'til the World Grits Festival in St. George, South Carolina: 8 Rank of the current U.S. job-creation streak (currently at 27 months) in terms of all-time job streaks: #9 Number of months the all-time jobs streak, which ended in 2019, lasted: 100 Minimum number of threats of violence received by Manhattan D.A. Alvin Bragg over his indictment of Donald Trump: 1,000 Number of pickleball players nationwide: 4.8 million Age of Mad Magazine cartoonist Al Jaffee when he died this week (he retired at 99): 102 - Your Thursday Molly Ivins Moment: I have known George W. Bush since we were both in high school—we have dozens of mutual friends. I have written two books about him and so have interviewed many dozens more who know him well in one way or another. Spare me the tough talk. He didn't play football—he was a cheerleader. "He is really competitive," said one friend. "You wouldn't believe how tough he is on a tennis court!" Just cut the macho crap—I don't want to hear it. If you are dead to all sense of morality (please let me not go off on the stinking sanctimony of this crowd), let us still reason together on the famous American common ground of practicality. Torture. Does. Not. Work. […] It is not productive. It does not yield important, timely information. That is in the movies. This is reality. I grew up with all this pathetic Texas tough: Everybody here knows you can't make an omelet without breaking eggs; and this ain't beanbag; and I'll knock your jaw so far back, you'll scratch your throat with your front teeth; and I'm gonna cloud up and rain all over you; and I'm gonna open me a can of whup-ass ... And that'll show 'em, won't it? Take some miserable human being alone and helpless in a cell, completely under your control, and torture him. Boy, that is some kind of manly, ain't it? […] Why did we bother to beat the Soviet Union if we were just going to become it? Shame. Shame. Shame. —November 2005 - Puppy Pic of the Day: And how did you sleep last night? - CHEERS to deflating the balloon. Ever since I joined an exclusive federal task force to analyze, calibrate, and implement our nation's response to high inflation, things have been moving in precisely the right direction. And although it's a bit early to be nominating me for the Nobel Prize in Economics, I have to say I'm doing the greatest job of any task force member since Lincoln. I ask for nothing in return but the opportunity to give humble thanks to the Biden administration for their faith in me me me me me: Inflation cooled in March as the Federal Reserve’s interest rate increases showed more impact, the Labor Department reported Wednesday. How inflation used to be dealt with. The consumer price index, a widely followed measure of the costs for goods and services in the U.S. economy, rose 0.1% for the month against a Dow Jones estimate for 0.2%, and 5% from a year ago versus the estimate of 5.1%. The data showed that while inflation is still well above where the Fed feels comfortable, it is at least showing continuing signs of decelerating. … A 3.5% drop in energy costs and an unchanged food index helped keep headline inflation in check. Food at home fell 0.3%, the first drop since September 2020. And guess what, Henny Penny? Egg prices dropped eleven percent!!!!! And that's…no yolk. You're welcome. CHEERS to windy times on the blue marble. Ever since I joined an exclusive global task force to analyze, calibrate, and implement our planet's green energy revolution, things have been moving in precisely the right direction. And although it's a bit early to be nominating me for the Nobel Peace Prize, I have to say I'm doing the greatest job of any task force member since Lincoln. I ask for nothing in return but the opportunity to give humble thanks to Greta Thunberg and all the climate youth around the world for their faith in me me me me me: Record growth in wind and solar last year pushed worldwide electricity generation to its cleanest-ever level, a report found, reflecting a renewable energy boom that researchers say could herald the “beginning of the end of the fossil age.” […] And with powerful new chemotherapy options, windmill-noise cancer is now a thing of the past. Solar was the fastest-growing source of electricity for the 18th consecutive year, the report said, rising by 24% year-on-year and adding enough power to meet the annual electricity demand of South Africa. The report found that the increase in wind generation, which added 17% in 2022, could have powered almost all of the U.K. “We are entering the clean power era,” said Małgorzata Wiatros-Motyka, senior electricity analyst at Ember and lead author of the research. “The stage is set for wind and solar to achieve a meteoric rise to the top. Clean electricity will reshape the global economy, from transport to industry and beyond.” And then all we have to do is sit back, enjoy the gentle flutter of the windmills, and wait a thousand years for the damage we did over the last hundred to reverse itself. I hope they give my re-animated head-in-a-jar a good vantage point to see it. I call dibs on the top of the Washington Monument. CHEERS to #3. Happy 280th birthday to founding father and President #3 Thomas Jefferson. Cormac O'Brien's book Secret Lives of the U.S. Presidents sums up the "Sage of Monticello" rather well (although we're quick to do a facepalm over his ownership and treatment of slaves which was, shall we say, deplorable): Thomas Jefferson was the walking, talking embodiment of the Enlightenment, a polymath whose list of achievements is as long as it is incredibly varied. As if penning the Declaration of Independence, sitting as governor of Virginia during the Revolution, and serving as Secretary of State in George Washington's first term weren't enough, he went on to do much more—architecture, linguistics, agriculture, philosophy, music, prose, you name it. While others dabbled, Jefferson mastered. Nice digs, Tom. He left behind a vast collection of essays and correspondence, which reveal a mind of stunning complexity and apparent contradictions. Jefferson was an avowed abolitionist whose fortune relied on a large population of slaves, a forward-thinking humanist whose opinions on minorities such as Native Americans could be truly alarming; a man whose awkwardness around women stood in stark contrast to his legendary romances. Pay your respects here. Jefferson, by the way, was also "fond of greeting ambassadors in his pajamas—a practice that most of them found appalling." If you ring our doorbell tonight, I'll treat ya to a free reenactment with a bonus spritz of Cheez Whiz. - BRIEF SANITY BREAK - x First time hearing yourself 💙 pic.twitter.com/iDldmAZkbP — CCTV_IDIOTS (@cctv_idiots) April 8, 2023 - END BRIEF SANITY BREAK - CHEERS to happy endings. 53 years ago this week, en route to the moon, Apollo 13 commander Jim Lovell announced, "Houston, we've got a problem" after Richard Nixon used his Sith powers to cause an oxygen tank to explode. (Did too! Look it up.) Just tell ‘em you’re on a diplomatic mission from Alderaan, Jim. Through sheer brilliance on the part of NASA's team and the crew, they returned safely four days later. A "successful failure" is what they called that mission. Or as it's also known: "a typical day at Fox News." P.S. Only 698 monthly payments to go and Jim Lovell will have paid for the damage. (They begged him to buy Geico exploding-oxygen-tank insurance, but did he listen? Noooo...) JEERS to America: land of the guns, home of the gun nuts. What happens in the wake of the mass shooting in Newtown Aurora Binghamton Tucson Santa Barbara Charleston Lafayette Roseburg Kalamazoo Orlando Alexandria Las Vegas Parkland Benton Pittsburgh Thousand Oaks Aurora Poway Highlands Ranch Virginia Beach Gilroy El Paso Dayton Midland/Odessa Fresno Milwaukee Atlanta Boulder Colorado Springs Chicago Buffalo Uvalde Tulsa Highland Park Colorado Springs again Monterey Park Nashville etcetera etcetera Louisville (5 dead, 8 injured by a disgruntled bank employee) is depressingly predictable: The community will grieve. Gun control advocates will wisely suggest that this might be a good time to review our federal and state firearms policies so that our nation's shameful record of gun violence might be improved upon. The right-wing gun nuts and media machine will claim it’s “just a lone wolf,” then blame Democrats (and their movies and video games and abortion and same-sex marriages and, of course, doors) for the carnage and urge every living soul and their pets to arm themselves to the teeth, and the NRA will insist it's "too soon" to talk about gun control as they continue scaring politicians into looking the other way by informing them that, "We'll be scoring you on your response." Like I said, predictable. Depressingly. Again. And again. - Ten years ago in C&J: April 13, 2013 OLLY OLLY OXENFREE to the master practitioner of "me time." Some loner who was arrested here in Maine this week is getting international attention. Christopher Knight—aka the "North Pond Hermit"—spent over two decades in the wilderness, confounding the nearby camp cottage owners from whom he stole food, batteries and other essentials over 1,000 times. When they heard about his amazing success at stealthily robbing people, Republicans immediately made him an honorary congressman. - And just one more… CHEERS to the sounds of our lives. The Library of Congress has added another 25 American audio gems to its National Recording Registry, a list of audio bon mots that ranges from the very first Mariachi recordings in 1908 to Jackie DeShannon’s What the World Needs Now is Love…from Carl Sagan’s 1994 “Pale Blue Dot” soliloquy to John Lennon’s Imagine. The 2023 class also includes the first sounds of a video game to join the registry with the Super Mario Bros. theme, powerful voices of women, important inductions of Latin music, and classic sounds of rock and pop from the 1960s to the ‘80s. Librarian of Congress Carla Hayden today named 25 recordings as audio treasures worthy of preservation for all time based on their cultural, historical or aesthetic importance in the nation’s recorded sound heritage. I had a “briefcase-style” record player similar to this one as a kid, but mine came with a built-in machine gun. “The National Recording Registry preserves our history through recorded sound and reflects our nation’s diverse culture,” Hayden said. “The national library is proud to help ensure these recordings are preserved for generations to come, and we welcome the public’s input on what songs, speeches, podcasts or recorded sounds we should preserve next. We received more than 1,100 public nominations this year for recordings to add to the registry.” The recordings selected for the National Recording Registry bring the number of titles on the registry to 625, representing a small portion of the national library’s vast recorded sound collection of nearly 4 million items. You can see all the entries going back to the Registry's beginning in 2002 here. Failing to make the list for the 21st year in a row: "Bill in Portland Maine Belches the Alphabet." I have one word for this election system: Rigged. Have a nice Thursday. Floor's open...What are you cheering and jeering about today? - Today's Shameless C&J Testimonial Lindsey Graham Has Idea To Make Voters Love Republicans Again, It Is Let's Ban Cheers and Jeers! —Wonkette - [END] --- [1] Url: https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2023/4/13/2163399/-Cheers-and-Jeers-Thursday Published and (C) by Daily Kos Content appears here under this condition or license: Site content may be used for any purpose without permission unless otherwise specified. via Magical.Fish Gopher News Feeds: gopher://magical.fish/1/feeds/news/dailykos/