(C) Daily Kos This story was originally published by Daily Kos and is unaltered. . . . . . . . . . . Books I Want To See Banned From Schools [1] ['This Content Is Not Subject To Review Daily Kos Staff Prior To Publication.'] Date: 2023-10-26 Book banning has become a popular pastime lately. It seems like everybody and their cousin is getting involved in this. I would hate to be the last person to come up with a list of books that should be banned from schools, so here I go; so as to beat the Christmas rush. The first books that schools should ban would have to be any book for learning French or Spanish. If a country cannot come up with a decent way to establish a single word to replace the English word “the”, they certainly should not be poisoning the minds of our children with a bunch of nonsense about words having “gender”. That is a slippery slope that no school child should have to face, so all the French and Spanish books are history. Latin needs to go as well. People in Latin America should learn American if they want to communicate with us. On the subject of history, it is time to reconsider what history we want out children to learn. All of the decadence of the ancient Romans and Greeks will have to go, of course. They Egyptian culture never learned how to dress properly, so our kids don’t need to see any of that either. While we are at it, much of the age of exploration does not make most of our ancestors look very good, so we might as well get rid of that too. Also, the terms of presidents Jackson, Andrew Johnson, Buchannan, William Henry Harrison, Franklin Pierce, Zachary Taylor, Warren Harding, both Bush’s, and Trump; were all times we should just not discuss at all, so that goes as well. The sciences also have some issues. Botany is for sissies, so we don’t need it. Likewise, Biology is pretty lame. If kids have not already eaten or been bitten by an animal, there is no reason they will ever need to know about it, so all those books are hereby banned. The rest of the sciences are probably okay, for now. Art is definitely gone. The last thing we need our kids learning about is what colors make up a rainbow. That just leads to the worst kind of trouble. Music needs some tuning up as well. If it was not recorded by the Rolling Stones, Elvis Presley, or Led Zeppelin, there is no need for kids to learn about it, or listen to it. That should pretty much clear the shelves of those pesky music books. It would be a great benefit for school bands to concentrate on the really great music to play at football games, like “Stairway to Heaven”, or “Sympathy for the Devil”. Most of the math books are pretty safe, although I would like to see any pages regarding algebraic functions ripped out of them. We could also dispense with anything having to do with sets and Venn diagrams. In the English department, all of the poetry is banned. Since there is so much, we can start off with Emily Dickinson, and work our way up to Longfellow and the rest. Since some people will still want some kind of poetry for their kids, the young ones can have Dr. Seuss and the older kids can study Bob Dylan. Diagramming sentences is a pain, so no more of that. Also, since kids just use acronyms anyway, we should replace a lot of the English books with just pages of letters. That way they can choose the letters they want and skip the rest. Domestic Science, which used to be Home Economics, needs a real overhaul. Any book that explains how to use “modern kitchen marvels” is gone. If my grandparents were able to exist without all these fancy doodads, then that should be good enough for our kids. It would be good for them to learn how to make their own soap from lye, and make dinner on a wood stove. They have to learn how to be self sufficient and get weaned off all these highfalutin “technologies”. There is room for improvement in Industrial Arts. First off, get rid of the “Arts” part. People just confuse it with Art & Music. We also need to see a return to learning the old ways of doing things. I don’t think there is a shop class in the country that teaches kids to shoe a horse, or stitch a harness. How will they ever survive if the power goes out? I am confident that we can expect to see kids enjoying school a lot more once these changes are implemented; and parents can rest easy knowing we are doing everything we can to give the then most practical education, while also shielding them from all kinds of evil and annoying books. [END] --- [1] Url: https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2023/10/26/2201883/-Books-I-Want-To-See-Banned-From-Schools?pm_campaign=front_page&pm_source=more_community&pm_medium=web Published and (C) by Daily Kos Content appears here under this condition or license: Site content may be used for any purpose without permission unless otherwise specified. via Magical.Fish Gopher News Feeds: gopher://magical.fish/1/feeds/news/dailykos/