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Can I Get A Little Teddy Pendergrass With That? [1]

['This Content Is Not Subject To Review Daily Kos Staff Prior To Publication.']

Date: 2023-12-22  

No Sex In A Senate Hearing Room! You’ll end up getting canned in more ways than one.

You need to move on over to a place where there’s far less traffic and accountability.

And, where might that be, you ask?

That place would be the Top-Secret return desk at the National Archives. Apparently, no one ever goes there unless there’s some type of directional screw-up.

I was going to apply for a job there because I thought it was a good no-show opportunity. But, I lost out to a holographic projection that does nothing more than say “are you lost?”

Since then, I think they’ve updated the thing to say, “we don’t take binders here”. And, in Russian, “be sure to patronize our outbound Florida branch, we can always use the money”.

Yeah, I could use the money too. Instead, billions and billions of taxpayer dollars were spent on national security and intelligence, just so Orange and company could hand out security clearances like gum drops.

Then, to add insult to injury, the most secret of secrets are handed over to mere political hacks like Soloman and Patel.

If Putin would have showed up, they probably would have given him the nuclear launch codes after flashing nothing more than a Moscow library card.

Come to think of it, maybe that was the game plan. Hang Mike Pence and grab the nuclear football. “Okay, Vlad has the codes, now we’re going to tush-push our way out of here”. “Where’s Meadows with the binder?”.

Good question. If I was the last one with the binder, they’d be interrogating me while shooting apples off my head — with a crossbow. And, that would be after the waterboarding.

But, not Meadows, or, any of the other happy-go-lucky, office holding, coup leaders.

Obviously, you’re not confined to a hearing room, and, you don’t have to worry about being canned when you’re screwing the American people.

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