(C) Alec Muffett's DropSafe blog.
Author Name: Alec Muffett
This story was originally published on allecmuffett.com. [1]
License: CC-BY-SA 3.0.[2]
 

@naomicfisher on screen time

2022-08-06 18:49:29+00:00

When parents talk to me about gaming and screens, it’s always about fear. ‘Will they get addicted?’ they ask me. ‘I can’t control my own use, how can a child do it?’. There’s so much fear that we have no time to talk about the benefits. So here are some of the things I see. 1/ — Naomi Fisher (@naomicfisher) August 3, 2022

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When parents talk to me about gaming and screens, it’s always about fear. ‘Will they get addicted?’ they ask me. ‘I can’t control my own use, how can a child do it?’. There’s so much fear that we have no time to talk about the benefits. So here are some of the things I see. 1/

I see children who don’t feel competent anywhere else in their lives, feeling good about themselves when they play video games. I ask them about it and they come alive. They often can’t believe an adult is interested. 2/

I see young people who are really isolated, starting to make connections through online gaming. They can start by in-game typing and then move into voice chat. The shared game takes the pressure off, and they can relate. 3/

I meet young people who can regulate their emotions with their tablet, taking some time out in their day to put on headphones and sink into their safe zone, meaning that they can carry on afterwards. It’s such a useful and portable way to take some time out. 4/

I do also see young people whose lives are really difficult, and they use gaming to avoid their thoughts and feelings. Their parents worry & start to put in bans. The thing is, the gaming is the solution they’ve found, not the cause. It’s the difficult life we need to change.5/

I meet many parents who say they have no idea what their children do on their devices, that ‘screen time’ is time for them to get on with other tasks. They treat screens in quite a different way to their children’s other passions. They don’t see it as worthy of their time. 6/

When I suggest to parents that they spend time with their children on screens, they return surprised. ‘We had no idea that they were doing so many things’ Or ‘they are building games or learning how to code’. It’s not longer the ‘screen time’ bogeyman, it’s real life. 7/

When we demonise screens, we risk demonising the things our children love. We denigrate their choices. We give them the message that the things they value aren’t worth the time, that they can’t be trusted to make decisions. 8/

When we instead join with them, we give them the message that we are interested in the things they enjoy. Even if we aren’t interesting in gaming, we can be interested in our young people and what makes them come alive. We can value the joy. 9/

We can learn to play Roblox, or Brawl Stars, or Minecraft, and appreciate the connection that that gives us with our young people. We can ask about their progress and about their new game. We show that we are interested in them. And from that seed, other things will grow. 10/

Originally tweeted by Naomi Fisher (@naomicfisher) on 2022/08/03.
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[1] URL: https://alecmuffett.com/article/16255
[2] URL: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/

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