2000 Downloaded from http://www.post-gazette.com/ae/20021129deadp2.asp Music Preview: Biographer recounts a life with the Dead Friday, November 29, 2002 By Scott Mervis, Post-Gazette Weekend Editor It seems strange that the Grateful Dead's publicist would turn around and write the band's biography, considering that it didn't happen in that order. Dennis McNally, a Ph.D in history who had written an acclaimed biography of Jack Kerouac, originally signed on in the early '80s as the band biographer. Little by little, because of his media savvy, he was pulled into the daily business of the Dead. He put the book aside in 1984 and did PR duties up until the day Jerry Garcia died, and beyond, now working with Grateful Dead offshoot, the Other Ones (see story below). But the Dead's ultimate demise in 1995 did give McNally a chance to write and publish "Long Strange Trip: The Inside History of the Grateful Dead," a historical treatment that not only follows the band's adventures but the interesting times in which they lived. While some have been critical of the idea of publicist-biographer, McNally swears that in true Grateful Dead fashion, nothing was held back. Here's what he had to say in a recent interview by cell phone from a Starbucks in Boston. First off, how have the band members reacted to the book? Not to pat myself on the back, but they loved it. They all vetted it first for fact and corrected fact and not one of them said, 'It's embarrassing, take it out.' 'Cause there's a lot that's embarrassing; they're not saints. It must have been unnerving to have them read it. I've been doing this for 20 years. I had my facts pretty accurately. I wasn't smart enough to be nervous. The whole point of Grateful Dead music was that it was honest, it was what was on their minds each night. There was no theater, no costumes, no funny stuff. That extends to them. They have solid egos about who they are. I mean, they're all crazy as bedbugs, 'cause they're musicians, of course. You were drawn into the magic the way everyone else was. Did it last for you seeing them night after night? I couldn't lock into the magic, because for the first hour and a half of every night, I was working my [behind] off. I was able to suspend being an employee and become a Deadhead most second sets. I was always one of those critical Deadheads. They're not all there just standing there dancing. A lot of them are standing there saying, 'This sucks. This isn't good enough tonight.' I was certainly bowled over in the earliest days and then it would be a matter of moments when I would just say 'Wow.' They're all strong personalities. Were they frank with each other? Up to a point they were. Unfortunately, toward the end, the only time they talked to each other was on stage. The business was pretty much on automatic pilot. It was kind of like a marriage that was going on for 30 years. What were some of the points of contention? If Jerry had a weak night, would they ever get on him? No, people would grumble a little. Billy [Kreutzmann] would complain to Mickey [Hart] or they'd roll their eyes. They were not confrontational. That was one way you could go on for 30 years. It happened. I remember one night Bobby [Weir] was so mad at the drummers, he drew up a petition that he wanted the rest of the band to sign. They sort of looked at him, like, 'Yeah, right.' The first lesson you learned is you never ever complimented them after the show. If you said, 'Oh great show,' they looked at you like you were dim. Because they were always critical of themselves. How hard was it watching Garcia struggle with his addictions? It was agony. You say 'addictions' because it more than just drugs, like watching him cheat on his diet and pretend to exercise and not. He had a self-esteem problem. He did not take care of himself. Remember, he died of a heart attack. He was a textbook, slightly overweight guy, still smoking, eating badly. What do you mean he had a self-esteem problem? How could that be? Hey, man, it doesn't matter what other people tell you. If you ultimately have doubts about yourself, and he clearly did. ... What person who respects himself would systematically destroy his own health? Why do you think he did drugs? He self-medicated for depression and anxiety. This is fancy talk but it's the truth. He was in emotional pain. As he got older the pressures of being Jerry Garcia made it worse. Were the band's days winding down even without him dying? It was very peculiar that at the same time his health troughed that our last tour should be such a horrible one in terms of logistics. ... At any rate, the answer is, it needed to stop for a time. I think if Jerry had made a full and whole-hearted recovery and he was trying, [it would have gone on]. Remember, he was sober when he died. He'd made his commitment. He'd made his stand. He could have died in some hotel room, but he died fighting, he died making a stand for the light. Was Three Rivers Stadium one of the last great shows? For my money. It had that certain aura, because it was so goofy with the rain shower. It was very odd and sweetly odd. Pittsburgh had a sense of humor. If you're going to have to stand around in the rain, you might as well keep smiling. What was the period after his death like for the band? I hate to say it, but was there almost a sense of relief? 6eb We had spent a lot of years worrying about Jerry and wondering what was going to happen. And now we knew. God knows nobody liked it, but for anyone who has ever had an family member ill for a long time and then die, there's a sense of resolution. Billy said, 'I can't tour anymore, I'm going to Hawaii.' Everybody said, 'Look. Let's take some space.' They each took some space. What about the Other Ones. Is it a living, breathing thing? Somebody said 'museum piece' and I understand the impulse to call it that. But that's not fair. You make your own judgment after you hear it. Here's why I don't think that: This band has rehearsed way more in one year more than the Grateful Dead did in five years. Last summer they played two shows. They got together in Alpine. They rehearsed Friday night -- hard. Saturday they played a very good show. They played 'Dark Star' and 'St. Stephen.' The audience was going bananas. Just on the one day, I could hear a progression. I kept thinking, 'My God, what's going to be happening after four, five nights on the road?' ----------------------------------------------------------- Scott Mervis can be reached at smervis@post-gazette.com or 412-263-2576. Copyright 1997-2002 PG Publishing Co., Inc. 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