Focus
=====

I feel like my focus is really fragile
these days. I don't know if that's
because of pandemic burnout, because of
all the stress we're under right now, or
if it's just always been this bad but
having so many more responsibilities
means that it's just more obvious.

I feel like it takes forever to sink
into that "thinking deeply" state and I
can get knocked out of it so easily,
sometimes just by the discomfort of
sitting itself.

Yesterday, I did something that felt
selfishly fun and went to the nickle
arcade that's a couple miles walk from
me. There was almost no one there, I had
an n95 on, and it felt like it was
pretty safe. I blew a few bucks on a
goofy co-op arcade shooter with my boyfriend,
played air hockey, and got way too
excited over throwing nickles into the
coin pusher.

I can't wait til I feel comfortable just
regularly going out for pinball again.