Taking a sick day
------------------

So I don't know if I'm actually still worn down from my booster shot,
because that wouldn't be unprecedented for how my body reacts to
vaccines, but I think some of my depression this morning was in fact
just pure exhaustion. I get *angsty* when I'm that tired, clearly.

I ended up taking a lot of today as a sick day, just laying back
catching up on gemspace and gopher holes. I've discovered some neat
things like this archive of old erotica newsgroup posts on
tilde.pink's gopher hosting: gopher://tilde.pink/1/~nifty

So I'm not being horny-on-main, I swear. I'm interested in it because
they archived this whole swath of cross-dressing/gender-bending
stories which I legit think is really important to have done! It's
this little slice of queer history of people figuring out complexities
related to their sexuality and gender and all of that, acting it out
in posting these low stakes stories. All these "oh haha wouldn't it be
so distressing to suddenly be a boy/girl and have everyone relate to
me that way, oh noooo" kinds of stories. 

I have a real soft spot for this kind of thing because story archives
online are how I figured out a lot about myself and my relationship to
gender and sexuality. Most of them were old even by the time I read
them. I discovered I like men in a gay way, women in a gay way, and
that boy would it be nice to just be neither myself.

So, yeah, I just think it's really cool that people are using the smol
internet to try and archive these little things that could be so
easily lost and yet in all likelihood represent frozen moments of
self-discovery hundreds and thousands of people had on the early internet.