March 2023 Five Questions - joneworlds@mailbox.org 1. If you were a potato chip (potato crisp, croustille), what flavour would you be? I would choose to be good ol' ammonia & dog shit flavour chips. Because then no one's going to eat me, and I'll survive. Unlike most chips. Bet you can't each just one... 2. What's the most unusual way you've made a new friend? I remember Glen and I had the 4-runner up on stands one day, for us to re-do the brake lines. And our pizza delivery comes and I'm trying to dig my wallet out of my pants pocket inside my coveralls, for to pay the delivery guy, whose name is Anil. And in my fumbling, I accidentally knock the pizza out of his hands, and wouldn't you know the box comes open and it lands face down in a puddle of oil and brake fluid. So I'm down on the floor trying to clean that up, and I go to stand up, hit the frame with my back, and I guess the 4-runner was not stable on those stands and the front end falls off, onto Glen. Brake rotor goes right through his skull. Killed instantly, as they say. And then I'm totally losing it, and Anil the pizza guy stays right through that with me, and held space and held me, and we've been friends since. And now we go together to his trauma group, since then. For if you thought my story's awful, you'd never want to hear what all Anil had to watch them do to his sister years ago. And you know, Anil even helped me finish that 4-runner. Together the took the truck down the east side of Lake Chowdercatt the following spring. Glen would have been glad, he'd have wanted that. Although on the trip back, we accidentally slid it off the road and down the bank. And I never bothered to come back for it to winch it out. So it's still there I guess. That would've pissed Glen off, he never had much patience with that kind of carelessness. But anyways, the point is that was a weird, awful way to make a new friend in Anil. But it's not too often you'd find a friend who'll help you clean your other friend's brains off a brake rotor. You surely often won't. 3. Tell me of a film, miniseries, play, or book wherein your sympathies for the protagonist shifted to the antagonist. What caused the sympathy shift? I remember watching Return of the Living Dead. The one with the zombie-turning gas from that old army barrel, and those punk kids. And I guess I'm rooting for the guys who opened the barrel, because you know I got a soft spot in me for bumbling numb-skulls like them guys. But then there's that scene when the zombies eat the police's brains, and then have the wherewithal to use their radio in the car to call for backup. Send more cops, send more brains. And then I'm just like, way to go zombies! That's a big brain move there. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Big brain. Rock on, zombies. 4. I wish to improve my Gopher phlog. I could justify the text, or add RSS functionality, or add external links of interest. What are your recommended resources for getting me beyond the basics? I like what you got. What I suggest, and I do this, but I think you actually do too, is to take out as many dates as possible. I think it's that "garden" idea. I'll speak for myself, and you take from it what you want: avoiding a chronological order will keep my deal fresher to a newcomer's eyes, if ever I stop adding stuff. Like if something happens to me. I think about that now, you know, and maybe you would too. Maybe next week this gopherhole's all that's left of me, because something'll smush MY brain this time. Like an ogre. Or a zombie. Or a brake rotor. 5. What's an entree you prepare so well at home that you don't order it at a restaurant? I never found a place that'll make a peanut-butter-spaghetti-cucumber-mustard sandwich as good as I do. Or that'll make one at all, actually. Believe me, I tried. I asked Turk, and he told me to get the fuck out of his store. So I won't ever order that again. Because if Turk ever were to cut me off, I'd never find a corn beef sandwich as good as his, and then I don't know what I'd do. I surely don't.