My daily routine keeps me fairly busy, fairly distracted. It's like
driving down an Eastern Tennesse highway in a thick fog bank. I'm so
focused on not running into any other cars, staying on the road, that I
don't pay any attention to non-essential surroundings.

Then mrs dirtyrig wakes me up with an alarming observation about some
terrible condition. Suddenly all the fog lifts and clears out my
peripheral vision. Now I'm suddenly conscious to this bad condition. My
eyes start wondering, brain starts spinning and before I know it
everything I look at is a dumpster fire.

It's not the best time to be the rock solid foundation to help mrs
dirtyrig dig herself out of the anxious place.

Then we talk. Openly. Transparently. Talk. Describe our emotions, worries
and fears. We team up together to pay attention to the emotions. Fixing
nothing, we work on relating and understanding. The fixing can come later;
now it's too important to have a relationship. She says relationships are
more important than dumpster fires.