,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, Friday, July 29th 2022 - Setbacks, Both Real and Imagined ''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''' I don't know if anyone reads my phlog. It doesn't really matter to me either way, it's mostly a place for me to vent and ramble. There's no consistent subject matter for anyone to latch onto, and I recognize that. That being said, if someone is keeping up on this journal, they would notice that yesterday I missed an entry. I try to post every day during the week, I only take Sundays off. Anyway I was in a bad place yesterday, physically, and I've been in a bad mental headspace for a little while now. Physically, my diverticulitis is flaring up. I'm out of fiber and I was trying to just tough it out until payday. This makes it nearly impossible to study on anything, as I can't sit down, so I haven't gotten any studying done since it started up on Wed. I won't go into any gross details, just know that it's miserable. Emotionally, I've been struggling with maintaining discipline in the lack of my motivation. It's hard for me, I've never exerter much discipline in my life. Everything I've accomplished has been because I was motivated to accomplish it. Which means I haven't accomplished much. As I'm rarely motivated. Anyway I am between therapists right now. I have no idea when I'll be able to see one again. So for now, this phlog is my therapy. And, along with some choice chemicals, my distraction from my physical discomfort. This is a short entry. Like I said, I can't sit down. - diviniti