"The We All Need Something To Hide Argument" The nothing-to-hide argument (Solove, 2011) pervades discussions about privacy and can be formulated like this: when the government gathers or analyzes personal information and people declare they are not worried, "I've got nothing to hide" entails "if you are doing something wrong you don't deserve to keep it private." Apparently it seems easy to dismiss the argument, as it is quite clear that everyone has something to conceal or that everybody [probably] has something to hide from somebody. But this kind of attacks to the nothing-to-hide argument are weak since they deal with extreme cases when formulated, such as "so if you've got nothing to hide can I see your naked pictures?", which are trivially misleading. In a less extreme form, the argument refers not to all personal information, but only to the type of data the government is likely to collect. In this form the argument is stronger, since the governments can justify a series of data collections for several purposes. For Slove the deeper problem with the nothing-to-hide argument is that it myopically views privacy as a form of secrecy and from that he identifies harmful consequences such as data exclusion, secondary use and data distortion. In this paper I present the 'we all need something to hide argument', a different perspective to the nothing-to-hide argument based on Slove's Kafkaesque problem. First I'll show how that the Kafkaesque problem relates to issues of information processing — the storage, use, or analysis of data, rather than of information collection. Then I'll present how these issues affect social structure by altering the kind of relationships people have with the institutions that make important decisions about their lives. Next I'll show the taxonomy of malware polymorphism to present cases where syntactic structures of programs are changed without semantic change along with code packing techniques used to obfuscate the understanding of the malware by an analyst, also used by malware to evade an antivirus system’s detection. Finally I'll argue that the syntactic-semantic changes performed by autonomous artificial agents justify the idea that we all need something to hide since privacy is not secrecy [following Slove] plus we are not empowered to control the flow of personal info and [lack of] decision diversity in an intrusive guided artificial agents scenario. Bernardo Alonso - vomitols@gmail.com // ext@sdf.org