# 05 Life is a theater

If the blogger creates its own character through posts, it's not the only way to create a kind of avatar of him/her-self. Who knows the real me when I'm not sure of who I am ? I am also what the others are thinking of me. And that's why I often think Life is a Theater.

We are a complex mix of what we want to be for the others and how we are seen by the others. The problem is that it often doesn't match. It's more evident in our digital life(s). Between surname or avatars, or our real name, we are building another character through words, sentences, videos, pictures or not. Like actors on a scene, we are giving a representation of the character «Me» to spectators. Who knows the real Iceman and is he the same than the one at home, the one at work, the one in a shop, at the doctor, etc...Some are really good to build a different personality to manipulate their audience. And some are telling too much or the same in real life, professional and personal life and even digital life. Are they bad actors in the theater ? Maybe or just too naive or sincere. 

I don't care about what everyone is thinking of me in my digital life. Some likes to read me, some maybe think I'm mad or stupid...I don't know and I don't care. I didn't received blackmail or insults. But it's also true than our image into other's mind are some kind of a nightmare. Especially if we care about someone's advice, because the person is important for us. I was very surprised to talk with people I have known in my childhood and how they remembered me. Of course, there's the filter of what they «can» say and what they really think. Luckily, it was in a positive way but maybe it's not that positive for digital life or professional life. I'm conscious there's a part of character building in that virtual world of the Internet. We are trying to keep some parts of our lives as private, as some are showing the most glamorous parts of their lives. That's a kind of game and I don't like to play it too much.

Since the SARS-CoV2 crisis and the beginning of remote working for me, my wife is maybe the only person to see 3 facets of my personality : The man at home for my personal life, Iceman in the digital life, and the man at work for my professional life. I'm quite different in the 3 facets but mostly similar. The 4th facet is what I am outside home for people I don't know. Everything is Me but it is answering to stimuli. I'm protecting my private life but I can tell the same thing in different ways considering the audience and the risks or other parameters. It's like wearing an uniform. It gives another impression of the person you can see, but with or without, it's the same person under the clothes. My authority on other people is different between all the facets. My self-confidence is different between al the subjects, all the situations. And I can appear more confident that I'm really are, more funny or serious that I'm really are.

Some jobs are more close to theater. The teachers are a kind of actors in front of a so difficult audience : Children. For a child, the teacher is an adult, an authority or not, an older person with knowledge of the subject he/she teach. The teacher must appear confident, strong even if he/she has personal problems. And the play is longer than some of Molière or Shakespeare, sometimes with not many intermissions. Not much paid in France, not recognized for what he/she does between the lessons, you can imagine how difficult it is to act as a teacher in front of the toughest audience in the world. I'm lucky to teach sometimes what I know to my colleagues who are very kind. And when I'm asked for an advice in a meeting, I must feel confident too, or… to tell that I must verify. all jobs that require performance are fairly close to theater. But you're not prepared for that at school, or so few. 

Even if you are doing a manual and solitary profession, you will be in that kind of play with you boss, your client, to present what you have done, what you are able to do, etc... I see that it's not easy for everyone, even for a person who is very self-confident in his/her personal life. I have a colleague who was mute in front of a big audience to present his activty, despite he's usually voluble and warm. Someone who doesn't know him could find him shy or stupid, what is so far from what he is. I was the same, 30 years ago but I'm more confident now in the same exercise because I take it as a game ... or a play. And I can sometimes feel who is good or bad in acting in his job. That's life...

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