I think you're forced to lie to yourself constantly "I'm ok"
   when you're not because you have to press forward... but in the
   process of lying to yourself and KNOWING you're lying to
   yourself, it spills out everywhere because if you can't be
   honest with yourself (because you don't want to emotionally
   victimize YOURSELF) then honesty with others also proves
   difficult.

   That's my 2 cents anyway. I could be WAY off base. [my answer to
   someone who doesn't understand why he's lying more to others]
   Well, I'm thinking some kind of deep self-protection - layers
   and layers of shielding... I dunno... maybe you're reaching an
   "I'm ok with being inconsistent"? at a deeper level? Hm, it's a
   nameless set of emotions it seems like.     I've suffered from
   anxiety all my life. THey used to call me "inconsolable" when I
   was little. I had biofeedback training when I was 11 years old.
   It helped a lot. Learned to pause and reflect a lot while going
   through life.

   Not a perfect fix. Still working on it. Still suffer from
   anxiety. But I'm able to reach a peaceful "ok-ness" most of the
   time now... as long as have SOME control of my surroundings
   somewhere... or at least can stick to a routine that I chose.