^PLEASE put this as your status if you know someone (or are
   related to someone) who has been eaten by pandas. Pandas are
   nearly unstoppable and when hungry, also breathe fire. 71% of
   people won't copy this into their status because they have
   already been eaten by pandas, 28% are hiding in their showers
   with fire extinguishers awaiting the coming Pandocalypse and the
   remaining 1% are awesome and will re-post.^