________________________________________________________________________________  DATE : 2021.06.18
  TIME : 12:19
AUTHOR : nelliott@sdf.org
  MOOD : BLANK
 TITLE : MY MENTAL JOURNEY
 
________________________________________________________________________________	My mind is always running, ideas are always churning.
Some are good, others are just half baked atbest. Until recently,
I haven't found a way to quiet them out. I used to just sleep it
off, and end up with wild dreams sometimes. Now, I've found that
if I exhaust myself through tough exercise, I can calm my mind
down. Unfortunately, it doesn't happen immediately. I need to
talk myself into starting out, and fight off stupid excuses. Once
I'm in the groove of working out, I can push myself into apoint
where I'm not thinking of anything, but my movements. A small
point intime, where I have some clarity, no worries, no anger,
no emotions at all. Thismoment, however brief, is peaceful. Time
doesn't exist, in fact nothing at all could exist, and I'd be fine
with that. I hope to continue exercising, without any body issues,
for the rest of my life. It's hard to live with past events that
have shaped me. There's a blurred line between experience, and
mental scars. The only way to change the past, is to change the
future.
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