2022-05-19
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  That one walks funny.
  That one is developing a back problem.
  This one has a self-imposed limp.
  This should pull his pants up.
  This one's knees do not like how much she eats.

I have developed a judging attitude about people's habits. I don't
particularly like it. I think when I was a lazier and more all 
over the place I was more lenient. Not that I tell anyone what
I am thinking about their postures, of course.

I have walked almost a thousand kilometers this year. Now I need
to take it easy for a couple of weeks to let my body prepare for
the summer of hiking. I find it is not very easy to keep myself
put. I decided to solve this by getting a bottle of vodka and
downloading a bunch of movies. For now it seems to work somewhat.

I don't know what sort of weirdo should I call myself. I live in
a building that is housing a lot of the sort of special people
with diverse sets of mental issues. Maybe it's fitting. They have
been placed here by the government, but I am paying my own rent,
that's the difference. Most of them do not answer when I say hi.

The building itself is within sort of a middle class neighborhood
built mostly within the past ten years. So this building is the
special building with special people in the center of the normal.
The neighborhood has a lot of kids and families. It is sort of
an isolated area.

I've been thinking of my long term future and I think I will have
to learn how to sail. It seems very well fitted with my style of
travel, and my ideological limitations. If I want to travel, yet
feel bad about flying, then sailing makes most sense. These
end times make sailing seem a good option too.

I've said before that limitations are somehow beneficial. Like
upward mobility is in fact sort of a curse as it provides you
with more options than you can manage. I think, maybe it's not
a curse, but you have to keep defining yourself in a way that
always keeps limiting yourself more and more, until you push out
the defined and refined you.

I have ruled out so much of the normalcy, by choice. I have
isolated myself, and made myself unreachable by all this
surrounding me. My faith is that this refinement will eventually
have to pull in similar material from the void.

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