Side Effects

Occasionally, as we get older and start taking lots of medications, we
stumble across that one pill that seems to solve a myriad of problems.
Having been on various medications for most of my life, I can say that
I've come across medications like that several times. And again,
recently so.

If you've read my previous phlogs, then you know that I've been
diagnosed with schizophrenia. It turns out, I was diagnosed many years
ago, when I was about seven years old. I was subsequently medicated,
and things did not go well. I would scream and fight to avoid taking
my pills. My family had to physically pin me to the ground and hold my
mouth open to force me to swallow the pills. I hated them. I hated
them mostly because they made my friends stop talking to me, which as
it turns out, is exactly what it was supposed to be doing. That's
because my friends who stopped talking to me did not exist.

Interestingly, that medication (which is now banned for various
heart-related side effects) also made me lose weight. I was rather
obese when I was born, but once I went on this medication, I got fit!
That was a very nice side effect. Unfortunately, this weight loss
concerned my parents, who figured that being fit was enough reason to
take me off the medication that the doctors told them to keep me on no
matter what.

So, I was taken off the medication, and nothing was ever said about
why I ever had to take it in the first place. No one in my family
mentioned it ever again.

Until recently when I told them that I was diagnosed with
schizophrenia. My sister was the first to bring it up, and she thought
that I knew, that I had remembered. So, she had a good defense for not
saying anything earlier. As for the others, they mostly just said that
everyone knew I was a little nuts, and that was okay. Well, it would
have been nice to know.

Now, I am back on medication, a different medication, but so far most
of the side effects I've noticed have been positive. One of them is a
drastic change in diet. So drastic that I get disoriented when grocery
shopping. I go to the aisle where I normally go (out of habit), and
there's nothing there that I want to eat. I have, on several occasions
now, had to walk through the entire store taking note of things I now
like and where they're at. It's a learning experience, eating like an
adult instead of a seven-year-old. I'm not buying licorice and ice
cream, but salads and vegetables. It's all very foreign to me.

But this is a very nice side effect, as is the apparent weight loss
that has started to happen. It might be a little late for me to gain
much in terms of longevity (schizophrenics have a much shorter life
span, statistically), but at least I may feel better for a while.

Another side effect is that I am able to think much more clearly,
which may be an effect rather than a side effect. I've started using
my calendar and various planning software to map out thoughts and plan
my activities. I'm getting more done and seem to be able to think
through things better. I like that.

I like this pill.