### red rocks ###

went to red rocks last night for the second time in a week, and for the second
time this season. Patty Griffin opened up for Gregory Allan Isakov, which was
a super chill, mellow kind of show. A little too chill. GAI is great, but he
can really put a crowd to sleep. No energy, the lights were so low we couldn't
see the band. It was the only Red Rocks show I've ever left early.

### yoga ###

I just found out that my home yoga studio is closing, which is a drag. It's
the place where I did my teacher training, and I love going to classes there,
and I just got on to the sub list there to teach. So I guess I'm glad that I
got to teach, like, 4 classes there before the buy out goes through.

it's being bought by a Corepower of all places, which just feels so anti what
this studio was all about. I shouldn't really speak about that I guess since
I've never actually taken a class at corepower, but the thing is, I don't want
to. It just feels so big and corporate and gross.

So today is 10/1 and the switch over happens 11/1. One more month. Good thing
we're doing our last "21 in 31" challenge starting today, hahaha. I should
participate in the challenge as kind of a farewell to the studio.

Now that I'm calming down a little bit, I guess I have to admit that I'm not
surprised that the owners are selling it. It's gone kind of downhill lately
after our last office manager left. And emails from the studio to us teachers
have always been like, Sell more memberships! Get more people in your classes!
Our numbers are low!

But I just figured that that's how it is for all studios. I mean, nobody's
actually _making money_ teaching yoga or running a studio are they? Not unless
you're a McYoga chain like corepower.

The news came out just now when the current office manager sent out a
sensational, emotional email (which is probably exactly why I started out
feeling so emotional about this--I was matching the energy in that initial
message) that was like, Don't know how to tell you this but we're all losing
out jobs!

There's a thing that I'm super intolerant of and which I don't have a great
name for, and it's when somebody reacts or responds to a legitimate event or
trigger in such a way as to maximize--often disproportionately--their
involvement and/or their reaction. Crying or causing a fuss such that the focus
suddenly shifts to consoling them and validating their own experience and
emotions at the expense of the feelings and experiences of others who may be
equally or more entrenched in the situation.

The "What About Me" response. The kind of self-important self-insertion.

(To whatever extent I happen to be engaging in that very behavior here and now,
I'm allowed to because this is my blog and I don't need to be careful about the
feelings and experiences of anybody involved because they're not here and they
won't read this because this is my secret gopher hole)

I just finished reading a book about racism in America and the author refered
to this, in the context of her narrative, as White Tears. As in "No White Tears
in this space." As in, it's not okay that you're suddenly, in this converation,
feeling sad about police violence against black people, for example, because
this doesn't effect you on a day to day basis like it does us.

It's disengenious and unfair to those who have to feel and sustain those
feelings day in and day out and deal with the consequences of those situations
in ways that white privilege won't allow white people to. In many speaking
circles, this No White Tears rule is often voiced as, If you're having a
significant emotional reaction, please leave the room. Which is fair. Because
it allows the converation and the focus and the energy to remain on the topic
at hand instead of on the reactions of one (outsider) person.

Anyway. I don't think the office manager was guilty of "White Tears". Nothing
quite that dramatic or serious happened here. But she did make a very emotional
and dramatic and self-important announcement when instead she could have taken
the opportunity to address the situation at hand by saying, for example, when
last pay checks will go out. Maybe mention a few other studios around town that
she can work with to get people auditions. She missed the opportunity to allow
the conversation and the focus and the energy to remain on the topic at hand
and on those others effected by the change.

So. One of the yoga studios I teach at, and the place where I first did my
teacher training, is closing down. I feel kind of sad about that. I feel happy
that I don't actually rely on my yoga teacher income. I feel worried and
concerned for those who do.

We'll see what happens.

Namaste.