My spouse is two weeks in to recovery from a surgery. Her elderly cat has been deteriorating and our level of fussiness over it (over her, over booboo the cat) is increasing.
I haven't been as good as my spouse was about changing out pee pads, but I've managed to keep everyone fed until today. At five in the morning I burst awake, hearing my name called in the dark. The cat is having some sort of seizure. We sit with her until it subsides. There's nothing to do about it before the sun is up, so I went back to bed.
At 9 I take a trip to the grocery store. We're almost out of everything and I feel like a shitty caretaker. Halfway to the store my phone starts buzzing, the cat needs to go to the vet, she's had another seizure. 
I'm impressed with how well my partner is dealing with all this. A couple of moments where tears start, but she's been preparing herself for this for a while. The vet says a lot of things that don't result in euthanizing our cat today but the sword of damocles is hanging over her. 

I've graduated from a two year animation program at the local community college, but I still work there on the weekends, watching over one of the computer labs as students work on assignments and watch awful game streamers on youtube with earbuds in. I try to get things accomplished when I'm here but I mostly play dwarf fortress and begin and delete a hundred sketches. 

Feels today are the spoiled, refrigerated celery of my aching neck in the too-cold computer lab air conditioning. The feeling of helplessness. The inertia that comes from disordered sleep. The knowledge that I am to be moving soon and I should be dissasembling my presence here. So much junk in my house to get rid of.