2023-10-15                         from the editor of ~insom
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   I always look forward to Looptober, and I never participate
   as much as I would like.

   I know it's unhealthy to beat myself up about it- but it's
   also worth examining the friction there is in me just giving
   in to doing something that I know that I will like. Brains
   are terrible things.

   Looptober in 2020 (the first year I did it) was such a great
   experience -- in part because I was already in a musical
   mood, and I had my gear set up right by my "work" desk --
   making it easy to just turn around at the end of the day and
   noodle on a synth patch and record something.

   But the other part, and something I think about a lot, is
   because of lockdowns. I simply didn't have that much to do,
   and I wasn't getting as distracted by new things as I
   usually would. I have no wish for the world to go back to
   that, but I think 2020 has left me with this gap where
   stillness should be.

   Even without paying work to distract me, my days are full
   (often of things that I like!) and the time for hobbies
   which have less immediate satisfaction (reading, music,
   painting) gets squeezed out for my quick wins (cycling,
   electronics, watching video).